Admitting Privileges

Admitting Privileges
By Emma X

Emma X
What's more American than legislating
morality, forcing invasive procedures
 and discriminating against the poor?
Happy 4th of July everybody!

In a last ditch panicked effort to control women and their bodies, Tea Party states are working feverishly to roll back the clock on Roe vs. Wade. With 2014 elections looming, time will not permit a constitutional change. They have been forced to use a State's Rights platform. Texas, Wisconsin, North Dakota and Arkansas are just a few states embroiled in pending law suits over restrictive new laws that severely curtail the number of abortion facilities and doctors available to women, and in some cases require additional unrelated medical exams designed to delay the process and shame and intimidate the patient. There have to be some personal rights violations in that prenatal package, but conservative legislators don't see it that way.

Admitting Privilege Requirements.
Many new anti-abortion state laws require women to
have an ultrasound to view the fetus.  The medical
reason is that angry white men understand that Jesus
wants  women to feel shame about their bodies and
their reproductive decisions, and also they are doing
it just because they can.  The majority of voting males
remain silent on the subject, even though they have
some very sensitive skin in the reproductive game.

The proposed legislation is not just about the number of weeks involved in the abortion decision process. Proposed bills contain Draconian measures designed to permanently close clinics, deny funding, intimidate medical professionals, and shame female patients.  If passed, these laws will effectively eliminate abortion rights within each State and allow the State to make decisions about medical necessity. The philosophy behind the legislation also seeks to legally control choices prior to conception by restricting access to birth control.  Neo-Cons agree that God gave us the sexual urge and told us to go forth and multiply, but left the procreation rule book to be hammered out by the State of Texas.  It makes perfect sense, doesn't it?

Jerking off the truth.
Representative Michael Burgess (R-Tex)
says abortion is wrong because fetuses masturbate.
His point was that 15 week old fetuses feel pleasure
 (and therefore pain).  His comments were based on
a single study where observations of a 32 week old
female fetus were reported, not a 15 week old male
 as reported by Burgess.  The study made no definitive
conclusion about fetal sexual activity.  Personally, I
am willing to believe that males begin masturbating
as soon as possible and do so at every given oppor-
tunity throughout life, maybe even before birth.  But
Mr. Burgess didn't clarify any issue with his comments.
Now ultra-conservatives will have to find a legislative
method to keep fetuses from sinfully pleasuring
themselves.  God's work is never done.

Proposed restrictions in every contentious area effect all women, but are devastating to poor women who may not have the means to leave the State for treatment. Restrictions on the availability of affordable birth control hit this same demographic, as does the curtailing of food stamp programs assisting poor families. That seems a bit discriminatory to me, both on an economic scale and on a gender basis.  I think we can all agree that it takes two to make an embryo. When legislating morality we should include all sinners in the process, including offending males.  

What's good for the goose is good for the gander.
 Men are in this reproduction game also, and presumably
equal to women under the law.  When it comes to goosing,
they should get a gander of both ends of the gender war.

Men in this culture have to provide financial support for the babies they help create, so why not let them share the social punishment for the decision to terminate an unplanned pregnancy.  If a couple decides they cannot afford a child, the male should be forced by law to also comply with certain invasive medical requirements before an abortion is approved, just like the woman.  If they are of reproductive age, we want men to be healthy as well, right?  Each man who has helped create an embryo should be obliged to have a complete proctological exam before the wanton temptress that led him down the path of sin can have her abortion.  And while the State approved doctor has a gloved hand up his ass, the prospective murderer can hear, as his female counterpart will, the ethical and moral precepts he is violating, and how each sperm in his ejaculate is sacred. Very few men would go through this experience before ultra-conservative reproductive philosophies would be up for re-evaluation.

The Tea Party may think children
growing up in poverty will ultimately
choose to vote Republican.  They should
  sponsor Young Republican meetings in
 orphanages and foster homes.

Gov. Rick Perry of Texas and
other politicians like him feel that
they own the only correct moral
perspective on this subject, and are
determined to insert their religious
beliefs into some very private places.
They remain equally unwilling to provide
support systems for women who
have children they cannot afford, or
resources for unwanted children who
will need food, shelter and education.

Its time for men to admit the privilege they enjoy by not being harassed by government sin policies, and start defending the women in their lives. For women, the greater sin is the abandonment of male responsibility, both in emotional terms and in the protection of personal rights.  Think of it this way: first they came for her, and I did nothing. Then they came for me with an ice cold cystoscope, and no legal provision for a local anesthetic.

And now a message from our legislation sponsor.
Jesus would like you to know that if we all would just quit having sex, everybody
would be in glory in just one generation.  Well, maybe not everybody.  There might
be special admitting privileges for some.