tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-59143792353095208352024-03-05T22:04:13.750-08:00The Maine Coon Revolution NewsletterAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06764990233512291170noreply@blogger.comBlogger82125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5914379235309520835.post-83557957457169462592014-01-11T03:41:00.001-08:002014-01-11T03:41:38.691-08:00Basketball Diplomacy<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span><span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>Basketball Diplomacy</b></span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>By Emma X</b></span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><b>Emma X</b></span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;">When it comes to launching</span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;">a moronic international </span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;">air ball, baby got game!</span></td></tr>
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<b style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Since <i>Like</i> finds <i>Like</i>, it is no surprise that Dennis
Rodman is now the de facto U.S. Ambassador to North Korea. The budding bromance between Rodman and Kim
Jong-un is a story of fraternal affection that a sports loving world should appreciate, sort
of the <i>Downton Abbey</i> of dictatorial
obsession with basketball. For Rodman,
Kim is the answer to a failed career that no longer provides child support
payments. To Kim, Rodman is the enabling exalted family member that he has not yet had executed.
It is a melding of crazed minds that traversed vast oceans and disparate cultures to become a profligate testament of self-aggrandizement masquerading as Basketball. It is a perfect storm
of overblown narcissism heralding a golden era of American-Sino hardwood diplomacy. Of course, the short
sighted don’t understand this synergetic roundball courtship. When good things happen to grandiose people, the haters
just have to weigh in.</b><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: medium;">Friend for Life.</b><br /><span style="font-size: xx-small;">"I love the guy," says Rodman about his best</span><br /><span style="font-size: xx-small;">friend Kim Jong-un. The world now waits to see<br />where this symbiotic relationship will lead.<br />Do you suppose Dennis kept that bridal gown all<br />these years just waiting for the right Dictator?<br />Unfortunately, most of the groom's family would<br />be absent from the nuptials, due to their dead<br />enemies of the state status.</span></span></td></tr>
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<b style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">And they have. Dennis
Rodman was forced to apologize for his bizarre rant about his ad hoc cultural
mission to North Korea, and negative comments about American political prisoner
Kenneth Bae. He used the Rob Ford
excuse, which is now the gold standard for explaining otherwise asinine behavior; he was stressed out and drunk at the time.</b></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">Kenneth Bae is a 45 year old American tour<br />operator who is imprisoned in North Korea for<br />allegedly plotting with the Chinese to overthrow<br />Kim's government. Rodman implied that the<br />accusations were true, then decided he should<br />not comment on political matters, particularly<br />when drunk. Family members of Bae are<br />horrified, suggesting that Rodman has seriously<br />hampered international efforts to obtain his<br /> release. Kenneth Bae's health is compromised<br /> after a stint in a North Korean forced labor camp.</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">A reflective Rodman expressed embarrassment<br />about his comments before heading out to a<br />multi-million dollar ski resort built by Kim</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">for his own amusement, so in his mind all is now<br />copacetic. A diplomatic screw-up won't hang over</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;">his hangover.</span><br />
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<b style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Drunk or sober, Rodman does not care about the
issues inherent in his open and loving relationship with BFF Kim. Murder, starvation, torture and illegal
imprisonment do not suggest character flaws to Dennis. After all, he worked in the NBA. Recognition of the real situation in North Korea might make Rodman morally responsible for his actions, and he's not prepared to deal with all that unnecessary negativity. Dennis just wants to be in a place where
he is worshiped and fawned over as he was in his glory days as a basketball star. The North Korean hunger games feed his massive ego, and provide the possibility of a little extra pocket change.</b></div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: medium;">The Long and Short of it. </b><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><br /></span></span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">North Koreans will make great</span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">basketball players, with glorious</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">destiny trumping size limitations.</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">Historians will call Dennis Rodman</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><i>The Ben Franklin of Korean</i></span></span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><i>Basketball Diplomacy.</i> Get with<br />the program, people. This is no</span></span><br />
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<b style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">But there is a positive take-away from all of this. The Rodman cultural exchange program affirms the right of a free American to travel the globe without restraint and make a righteous horse's ass out of himself in front of the whole world. Insensitivity, ignorance and a lack of compassion are not a deterrent to our ability as a Democratic people to publicly gratify our own selfish needs on the backs of others, or to do so without the burden of a simple sense of decency. We enjoy personal freedom so privileged that brave North Korean patriots are dying in an effort to achieve it. One wonders if the irrepressible Rodman can appreciate the irony.</b></div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: medium;">The Pyongyang Dream Team.</b><br /><span style="font-size: xx-small;">Many of Rodman's fellow players are angry<br />with how things were handled. They did not<br />know they were a birthday present for the<br />Supreme Leader. Recent studies show that</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">only 17% of successful American college</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">athletes are functionally literate. Evidently</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">working in the NBA does not require a</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">basic knowledge of history or current events</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">either.</span></span></td></tr>
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<b style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">By the way, the American exhibition team lost the match with
the <i>North Korean Nationals</i>. Dennis may be selfish and crazy, but he is
not stupid.</b></div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: medium;">"Happy Birthday Supreme Leader and Commander of the Korean People's Army and First Secretary of the Worker's Party of Korea, Happy Birthday to You!" </b><span style="font-size: xx-small;">Dennis stated on camera that the exhibition basketball game was not in honor of Kim Jong-un's 31st birthday. Here is Rodman singing "Happy Birthday" to Kim, then bowing to him. If you are a real world leader, Marilyn Monroe leaves her underwear at home and sings "Happy Birthday" for you. If you are a pissant sociopathic third world despot, you get Dennis Rodman. To be fair, we all know that Dennis would be willing to perform in a low-cut slinky dress.</span></span></td></tr>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06764990233512291170noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5914379235309520835.post-60406023624147095532013-12-19T05:31:00.000-08:002013-12-19T05:38:00.587-08:00White Santa<br />
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<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>White Santa</b></span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>By Santa Claws</b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: red; font-size: xx-small;"><i>With Apologies to Irving Berlin</i></span></span>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: medium;">Santa Claws</b><br /><span style="font-size: xx-small;">He sees you when you're sleeping,<br />and he wakes you up at 4:45 a.m.</span></span></td></tr>
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<b style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I’m dreaming of a white Santa</b><br />
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Just like the one I’ve come to know<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>When the treetops glisten, I pause to listen <o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>And hear his familiar “Ho, ho, ho!”<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<o:p><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span></o:p></div>
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<o:p><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span></o:p></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>I’m pleading for my white Santa.<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>How dare you say that he’s not real?<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>When he comes to please us, he brings white Jesus<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>And they provide that Christmas feel.<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<o:p><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span></o:p></div>
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<o:p><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span></o:p></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>I do not like your black Santa<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>He doesn’t look like folks I know<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Do I leave milk and cookies, like other Christmas rookies,<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Or just a bag of snow-white blow?<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<o:p><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span></o:p></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>And what would I do with brown Santa<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>When every Yuletide scene is white?<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Should I have to cater, to some off-season waiter?<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>I can’t believe that that is right.<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<o:p><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span></o:p></div>
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgdTr4bYwDjXZyuyFkcbDNafzffwxdRuctyoXIehFHzhSvyvgL9AH-QaxFbuM7EPTaGxxw-ifo1f3hudw8kdk08Rl1BxCXx9An669bWH3_UB0nlrOoYcpLWaeotMyS0F-TDCYr1ol1vxsqx/s1600/santa+moon1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgdTr4bYwDjXZyuyFkcbDNafzffwxdRuctyoXIehFHzhSvyvgL9AH-QaxFbuM7EPTaGxxw-ifo1f3hudw8kdk08Rl1BxCXx9An669bWH3_UB0nlrOoYcpLWaeotMyS0F-TDCYr1ol1vxsqx/s400/santa+moon1.jpg" width="298" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: medium;">Is Santa White?</b><br /><span style="font-size: xx-small;">Here's proof that the carpet doesn't<br />necessarily match the beard!</span></span></td></tr>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>I’m safer with the FOX Santa<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>With ruddy cheeks and skin that’s bright,<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Because his lack would make me bluer; I'm an old and biased viewer<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>To whom a brother might cause fright.<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<o:p><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span></o:p></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>I’m sticking with my old Santa<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>'Cause he is Jesus’ white friend Nick.<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Don't let me hear you say, sir they make my Christmas “gay” sir,<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>You know the Bible says that’s sick.<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>I’m pulling for my white Santa,<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>The only one I’ve ever seen<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>On every card and letter, his business just gets better,<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>He’s white, but he can bring in lots of green.<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<o:p><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span></o:p></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>I’m dreaming of my white Santa<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>'Though you may think that I’m a fool.<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>I may not see what's real now, but homey here’s the deal now<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>A man who looks like me should rule.<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<o:p><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span></o:p></div>
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<o:p><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span></o:p></div>
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjZg0-qutIGy8f9oH6QM2yoF13zYs7a4HCwa8FC9aqSNnuxFm5z8PmMa-BAQbfts1mOBjvph72Mhjckcs0J0_fMxuxAtmVFzFQQY3cempXHVhyphenhyphenNouxSIODHpadPkCXk0qf6wXhXsyXGVTgn/s1600/greek+santa1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjZg0-qutIGy8f9oH6QM2yoF13zYs7a4HCwa8FC9aqSNnuxFm5z8PmMa-BAQbfts1mOBjvph72Mhjckcs0J0_fMxuxAtmVFzFQQY3cempXHVhyphenhyphenNouxSIODHpadPkCXk0qf6wXhXsyXGVTgn/s400/greek+santa1.jpg" width="318" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: medium;">The Real St. Nicolas?</b><br /><span style="font-size: xx-small;">Don't trust Greeks bearing gifts!</span></span></td></tr>
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<b style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I’m grateful for the 2<sup>nd</sup> Amendment</b></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>As we all move toward Christmas Day,<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>'Cause if some fur-clad pigmy comes down my freakin’
chimney<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>I'll blow that Kwansa elf away!<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><i>Now may your days be merry and bright,</i></b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><i>And for God's sake let </i></b></span><b style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i>my Santa Claus be white.</i></b></div>
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<o:p><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span></o:p></div>
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<o:p><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span></o:p></div>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiPgaT_bvBuylNusMfyOgZY50bza72dCkPKdbBP5dTGxpoIScj2UWvpDTnlkkLtD_S-gvxs7mXsJmezDYngbL5F2Swy-4SaI-a83ZQGuIiAMX9jj-L7vOyMoYOYGyu5D0BLnErHX0hZM1uU/s1600/megyn+kelly2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="494" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiPgaT_bvBuylNusMfyOgZY50bza72dCkPKdbBP5dTGxpoIScj2UWvpDTnlkkLtD_S-gvxs7mXsJmezDYngbL5F2Swy-4SaI-a83ZQGuIiAMX9jj-L7vOyMoYOYGyu5D0BLnErHX0hZM1uU/s640/megyn+kelly2.jpg" width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><span style="font-size: small;">Great Moments in Professional Journalism: </span></b>Megyn Kelly confirms the white genetic heritage of both Santa and Jesus for our children, but reminds us that her reporting was 'tongue in cheek', and that if we didn't understand that, we are humorless. I don't know, it all seemed pretty funny to me. In fact, I never take her seriously.</span></td></tr>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>I’m dreaming of you, Megyn Kelly<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Maybe you’d go for stuff like me?<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Since I look like
Santa, I'd like to plant 'ya<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>On my chubby, that is my cushy Santa knee.<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>I watch you daily, Megyn Kelly.</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>I don't believe what they all see!</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>I believe you have a brain there, but that stupidity you feign there</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Appeals a lot to guys like me.</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>I think about you, Megyn Kelly</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>I love to see your pretty face</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>I like your FOX News hoodoo, and I see all that you do do</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>To keep white women in their place.</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>You cater to me Megyn Kelly</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>that makes me think that I have hope!</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>With our same philosophizing, a</b></span><b style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">nd my special interest rising</b></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>My admiration ain't soft soap.</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>I don't give a damn my Megyn Kelly</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>If your credentials don't check out.</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>All that matters now to me is, and what I clearly see is,</b></span></div>
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<b style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">You love a white man that is stout.</b></div>
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<b style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></b></div>
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<b style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Here's to you my sweet Megyn Kelly.</b></div>
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<b style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I don't dare hope you'd be my wife,</b></div>
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<b style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">But I like your skin so soft, dear and I like my blondes pissed off, dear.</b></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Dear Meg, you have a fan for life.</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><i>So may all your ravings stay true.</i></b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><i>I get all my Christmas joy from you.</i></b></span></div>
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<o:p><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><span style="color: #134f5c;"> </span><span style="color: red; font-size: large;">Happy Holidays Everybody!</span></b></span></o:p></div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06764990233512291170noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5914379235309520835.post-32847640099893230362013-12-14T04:27:00.000-08:002013-12-14T04:27:58.185-08:00Special Education<br />
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<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>Special Education</b></span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>By Emma X</b></span><br />
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<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj2QCKYHEFVpul2R3ER3yW_p4EWJJzBWsITlSU1qBEjSA5Cs3c3biMqaKJma8WJ1SHe0ltphx3YB1AuM44dCGnkU6Pjq1UcfofkIRGGBmtRx3Qysrgno_1oMVUdYm7UXQgNRwunvCTO0HL-/s1600/emma1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj2QCKYHEFVpul2R3ER3yW_p4EWJJzBWsITlSU1qBEjSA5Cs3c3biMqaKJma8WJ1SHe0ltphx3YB1AuM44dCGnkU6Pjq1UcfofkIRGGBmtRx3Qysrgno_1oMVUdYm7UXQgNRwunvCTO0HL-/s200/emma1.jpg" height="196" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><b>Emma X</b></span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;">Once you have proved</span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;">yourself remedial, you </span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;">can expect to be re-</span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;">moved from the </span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;">achievement group.</span></td></tr>
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<b style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">It’s official. The
113<sup>th</sup> Congress has accomplished less than any other seated Congress
in American history. Congratulations to
all obstructionist Conservatives who made this questionable achievement possible.</b><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjFFXdtsZc48TdrLX76-t-2jGpui-Zmph9sNSgNa0KE8yj-epnUbKa1MbMZFv6B3UfvlS0txzEz77zLNdWOU9okZrepzDQUCAy_sY6lkIhQ5BCt8dkv_WITLP5Om3D30Q3xxGW5aNnpSDxJ/s1600/CONGRESSIONAL+AWARD1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjFFXdtsZc48TdrLX76-t-2jGpui-Zmph9sNSgNa0KE8yj-epnUbKa1MbMZFv6B3UfvlS0txzEz77zLNdWOU9okZrepzDQUCAy_sY6lkIhQ5BCt8dkv_WITLP5Om3D30Q3xxGW5aNnpSDxJ/s400/CONGRESSIONAL+AWARD1.jpg" height="400" width="211" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><span style="font-size: small;">The Congressional</span><br /><span style="font-size: small;">Non-Achievement</span><br /><span style="font-size: small;">Award</span><br /><span style="font-size: xx-small;">presented by a pissed off nation<br />to members of the 113th Congress<br />in recognition of their historic<br />2013 group jerk-off. <i>When times</i></span></b></span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><i>were toughest, you were at your</i></span></b></span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><i>worst.</i></span></b></span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><span style="font-size: xx-small;">'uti me sicut enim exhibuistis membra</span></b></span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><span style="font-size: xx-small;">Americae'</span></b></span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><br /></span></b></span></td></tr>
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<b style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Of course, to them this is not a bad thing, as Speaker John
Boehner himself suggested this week. He
stated he would rather be judged by the legislation they repealed rather than
what they passed. I guess he thinks that
he finally accomplished something no one else has ever been able to accomplish,
which is to build on a negative.</b></div>
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<b style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">So let’s grade House Republicans on what they repealed. <i>Oops</i>. There were forty-three failed attempts to repeal <i>Obamacare, </i>and once again in 2013 their major repeal effort failed. So t</b><b style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">he final Congressional report
card score? Zero performance, with concerned
comments about attitude problems and aberrant antisocial behavior.</b></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj2HSAOaZ9KMNbqnY0u7qaQUrHeA1ZlsVjvWenHMdUDkqGaNR4qCXttysvfwhKqv95NOVkC1KY_opL81kDwqIPssVqhc3O5DyEkUp-NwcoWRPzXPfJ4_K_vALRq8vmaz_L1fovH6SPgyJl4/s1600/pac+money1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj2HSAOaZ9KMNbqnY0u7qaQUrHeA1ZlsVjvWenHMdUDkqGaNR4qCXttysvfwhKqv95NOVkC1KY_opL81kDwqIPssVqhc3O5DyEkUp-NwcoWRPzXPfJ4_K_vALRq8vmaz_L1fovH6SPgyJl4/s400/pac+money1.jpg" height="400" width="358" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: medium;">Sympathy for the Devil</b><br /><span style="font-size: xx-small;">In embracing compromise John Boehner has<br />not only invited vitriolic criticism from the hard<br />right, he is risking a possible lucrative post-<br />Congressional Conservative PAC job. For a<br />career politician in today's patronage environ-<br />ment, there could be no worse outcome.</span></span></td></tr>
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<b style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Of course, Boehner was hampered by the Tea Party, from whose
perspective Boehner himself is a Socialist, with everything to the left of
Boehner being part of the upcoming Satanic Apocalypse. He forgets that early on you couldn’t
separate his conservative rhetoric from theirs.
He mis-remembers how he welcomed their activism and publicly enjoyed
their attacks on the opposing party. How
painful it must be for him now to be shamefully grouped in with the freedom-hating
enemies of Jesus.</b></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjqIeg9jwoGEDS60TXZ4odDk1R8mD0X0rSW9tQshJBXr3ylFnPfuPUZ_brp3PqpPWlc3BCTcz5_u0kCZk_ow489PIn803BJpCbSZpVGNnTBX3hIsbnsthjelzyOTmEryoGyeWotvOK32i0A/s1600/bull+in+a+china+shop1.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjqIeg9jwoGEDS60TXZ4odDk1R8mD0X0rSW9tQshJBXr3ylFnPfuPUZ_brp3PqpPWlc3BCTcz5_u0kCZk_ow489PIn803BJpCbSZpVGNnTBX3hIsbnsthjelzyOTmEryoGyeWotvOK32i0A/s400/bull+in+a+china+shop1.png" height="324" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><b>Got Milk?</b></span><br /><span style="font-size: xx-small;">The Tea Party has been like a bull in a china </span>shop, <br />preventing both moderate Republicans and<br />Democrats from selling their wares. The rise</span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">of extremism and special interests in American</span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">politics has educated everyone as to how fragile<br />Democracy can be.</span></td></tr>
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<b style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">But to his credit, Boehner is now part of the newly-anointed
Centrist Republican voting block that has learned its lesson, albeit the hard way. Ted Cruz performed his multi-city anti-big
government road show, ending with a pyrotechnic homage to the <i>John Birch Society</i> that literally
brought down <i>The House</i> in Washington. Since it is Boehner’s job to clean up the
damage, the issues are finally patently clear to him. So now there is a bi-partisan budget deal
that will end <i>The Sequester</i> and
reduce government expenditures, an easy compromise that Boehner could have supported
years ago had he not been dazzled by the heady promise of privileged life in a
Conservative political <i>Disneyland</i>
funded by rich activists. Sorry for your
disappointment, John. We’ve all been
there. It’s time to go back to your
meetings and work the program.</b></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhFH8lfQ1UXHU0Ke-oNz5sXLE1URALEKs-VDD3lZ5CrHfNc6-CvyZ3XCEIfaKITUUBLKRwziLsay9sJ91FyMs4QGmbDXvdzA_4i_0skmLCq1jpqTITjIHvMMdoOPJ68ObyrIbovHy6mYaos/s1600/ted+cruz+sign+language2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhFH8lfQ1UXHU0Ke-oNz5sXLE1URALEKs-VDD3lZ5CrHfNc6-CvyZ3XCEIfaKITUUBLKRwziLsay9sJ91FyMs4QGmbDXvdzA_4i_0skmLCq1jpqTITjIHvMMdoOPJ68ObyrIbovHy6mYaos/s1600/ted+cruz+sign+language2.jpg" height="195" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: medium;">Signs of the Apocalypse?</b><br /><span style="font-size: xx-small;">Ted Cruz also took criticism from the Tea Party<br />this week for attending the memorial service<br />for Nelson Mandela, a man whose principles<br />are an anathema to the far right. The only<br />black man they want to eulogize is President<br />Obama. But Ted has moved beyond Party <br /> dogma, and his signs are easy to interpret.<br />He wants to be viewed as a player on the<br />world stage, because he wants to be President.<br />His rabid supporters on the right may require<br />some special education as well. Ted has learned<br />that in order to move up, you must eventually<br />come to a compromise.</span></span></td></tr>
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<b style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></b>
<b style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></b>
<b style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></b>
<b style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">So this is the legacy of
the fighting 113th; They show
us that whatever we do in the world outside of Washington, however we may screw
up, however badly we miss expectations, or how shockingly racist and bizarre our
public rhetoric may be, we will never <i>ever</i>
achieve the low mark that these teat-sucking toadies of <i>Big Patronage</i> have established. Congratulations, members of Congress. You are now officially the worst. There is no need to be modest about it
anymore. Your report card is in.</b></div>
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<b style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">But here's good news. Now that <i>The House </i>has passed its first budget in four years, the Tea Party
can try multiple times to repeal it, just like <i>Obamacare</i>. There is no freedom-loving momentum like Democracy in
action. And it's always best to look busy when you're on the government payroll.</b></div>
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<o:p></o:p><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh6j3k9DcDrbIjFqTspLsCRDEST-c6k9IiosxJp6wJnlUzMhV5HA3jqlSkRiMu4afNtdKZt4i4IXNrf0zkSx1PPdmWvkHqVljmqz-BfnfdOVdhsAK6HZYAvfbFTf47N9lEkPP2iWvtItKpQ/s1600/dashed+hopes1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh6j3k9DcDrbIjFqTspLsCRDEST-c6k9IiosxJp6wJnlUzMhV5HA3jqlSkRiMu4afNtdKZt4i4IXNrf0zkSx1PPdmWvkHqVljmqz-BfnfdOVdhsAK6HZYAvfbFTf47N9lEkPP2iWvtItKpQ/s640/dashed+hopes1.jpg" height="586" width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: medium;">Having failed in every aspect of performance, </b><span style="font-size: xx-small;">Congress now qualifies for remedial special education.</span><b style="font-size: medium;"> </b><span style="font-size: xx-small;">Unfortunately they voted against that program.</span></span></td></tr>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06764990233512291170noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5914379235309520835.post-25088740297693168472013-12-07T05:00:00.001-08:002013-12-07T05:00:11.202-08:00Tweet Conceit<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>Tweet Conceit</b></span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>By Emma X</b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
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<br />
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhrKJ0ifdSIZs4ZNRkykD8o3uO_gN0-VzQ-Ke57HJ_r_MImvETDsw2Duf0WWgJsbUHVd3q7dzmy24Xp8aw6uFT5oXyE6vSNQ8s5TksRmrwGUkcHIOaMYUOfrT8ix29zjYw7wp6L30KQmjvq/s1600/emma1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="314" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhrKJ0ifdSIZs4ZNRkykD8o3uO_gN0-VzQ-Ke57HJ_r_MImvETDsw2Duf0WWgJsbUHVd3q7dzmy24Xp8aw6uFT5oXyE6vSNQ8s5TksRmrwGUkcHIOaMYUOfrT8ix29zjYw7wp6L30KQmjvq/s320/emma1.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><b>Emma X</b></span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;">It is a sweet tweet that bleats defeat.</span><br />
<span style="color: #3d85c6; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;">#whitepeoplebecrazy</span></td></tr>
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<span style="color: #134f5c;"><b><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The GOP is very good to its base. </span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">They work hard to provide the emotional
succor needed to justify a confusing Conservative social philosophy.</span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> </span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">When doubts materialize, they are quick to
respond with a comforting little made up aphorism.</span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> </span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">For example, “How can you be racist, when
racism is over?”</span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> </span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">It’s a simple and sweet
solution, and its most kind to anyone burdened with a pesky social conscious.</span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> </span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">But what works for core voters does not
necessarily play to the rest of the world, and that is where Reince Priebus has
gone wrong once again.</span></b></span><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj6CicEmi2XroVQOSFeVwyqJMph3X9-ouzAfXLG33wjTB_Aj9sLdtBwbTa3gZiTkQyGRHj_eqSRj5eNGJPfkeziY8-t-u5lwndTsAhyphenhyphen9Z42dNqtf3jxvleXVgAGANVpWU2zYwxts9co3Ern/s1600/reince+preibus+as+child2+copy.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj6CicEmi2XroVQOSFeVwyqJMph3X9-ouzAfXLG33wjTB_Aj9sLdtBwbTa3gZiTkQyGRHj_eqSRj5eNGJPfkeziY8-t-u5lwndTsAhyphenhyphen9Z42dNqtf3jxvleXVgAGANVpWU2zYwxts9co3Ern/s400/reince+preibus+as+child2+copy.jpg" width="300" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: medium;">theworld@yourtweet</b><br /><span style="font-size: xx-small;">Reince Priebus believes that a simple<br />misuse of words should not have garnered<br />the world-wide criticism that it engendered.<br />He is just trying to keep communications at<br />the third grade level at which he and his<br />Party base operate. He thought that<br />congratulating the brave black lady for<br />choosing to ride up front was a nice way to<br />invite minorities to come in to the big tent.<br />It was a friendly thought that got lost in an<br />inappropriate discussion of semantics.</span></span></td></tr>
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<b style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">You can’t blame the guy for trying. It’s much easier to just announce the end of
racism than try to change Party culture.
And if the pen is indeed mightier than the sword, then a well-crafted
tweet can end all debate in 140 characters or less. It is an affirmative message that <i>all is well</i>,
packaged in a repeatable savory nugget that comfortably fits the American
voter's ever decreasing attention span limit. In the end
we are barely inconvenienced by philosophical debate. All we have to do is believe and share.</b></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhpuh-KiW4PSrkn_qzMhGf_BCYS7ou2u3QGYcfZawQ6PFXn8ejA4W1sSECUw72zhCn263OyTsvfKECyFJfq2fPtD2-EMaxF9UzaSAevtds3_QTRMZ5OTOzJWm51w0SvhkoGN0Wn_L5FAzIM/s1600/twitter+logo2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="385" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhpuh-KiW4PSrkn_qzMhGf_BCYS7ou2u3QGYcfZawQ6PFXn8ejA4W1sSECUw72zhCn263OyTsvfKECyFJfq2fPtD2-EMaxF9UzaSAevtds3_QTRMZ5OTOzJWm51w0SvhkoGN0Wn_L5FAzIM/s400/twitter+logo2.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: medium;">Trick or Tweet?</b><br /><span style="font-size: xx-small;">Yes, it could have been a simple error. But<br />the Supreme Court gutted the Voting Rights Act<br />of 1965 with the opinion that voter discrimination<br />against minorities no longer exists. From the<br />Conservative point of view, the celebration of<br />minority enfranchisement is long overdue.<br /><br /><br /><br /></span></span></td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<b style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Priebus continues to promote the Republican Party as
minority friendly despite all evidence to the contrary. But he knows that Conservative media has successfully spoon-feed the faithful with subliminal messages
that bolster the cause, such as “Obama is a Socialist and a Muslim”. And social media gives Tea Party members that can
tweet something to do with their hands while they’re sitting in their recliners watching FOX News. So the
Rosa Parks "racism is over" thing was beautifully crafted for consumption by base voters. From Reince’s viewpoint that little revisionist pearl was also the perfect big tent Republican Party minority greeting. What a shock it must have been for him to
discover that people who are actually discriminated against on a daily basis do
not agree with the assertion that racism has ended. Conservative media has spent two decades constructing weaker and weaker arguments for discrimination until the whole topic is no longer considered
rational in their book. Perhaps RNC
leaders have genuinely convinced themselves that the old nasty discussion is really
is over.</b></div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: medium;">Tweets for the Effete Elite.</b><br /><span style="font-size: xx-small;">Future efforts to convince minorities that the<br />Republican Party has their back may have to<br />beat a hasty re-tweet as well. In the end, the<br />flagship effort caused even more negative<br />publicity for the RNC.</span></span></td></tr>
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<b style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Well, maybe. But I don’t
believe it, because every other message the RNC sends out is crafted and polished
like a well-cut gem. Their purpose here
was to help you to absorb the phrase “end of racism’. Their naivete was not believing the message,
but believing that it would float through Liberal cyberspace like a fairy-light, rainbow-colored butterfly.</b></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c;"><b><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The Republicans have spent no time trying to repair the
rotting foundation of their antiquated house, but they have invested a lot of time
and money in whitewash to try to sell it.
The “racism has ended” message was created and circulated long before it
was boiled down to 140 characters. The Rosa
Parks tweet was just another little propaganda balloon that popped in their face. And even though the intent was
positive, RNC efforts to promote happy race relations have been stomped by the public rhetoric of Conservative bigots, and the damning obstructionist legislation put forth
by Republicans in Congress. You can’t
vote against food stamps in this economy, or launch a vile anti-Mexican assault
on immigration law and still tweet happy thoughts about how racial discrimination ended fifty-eight years ago when bus seating restrictions were reconsidered. It is the repeated Party support of systemic racist policies that will alienate Republican national candidates from minority
voters in 2016. But keep thinking those happy thoughts,
RNC. If and when you get around to
realizing that your Party actually represents the cultural values that put Rosa
Parks at the back of the bus to begin with, then you can tweet us about that
glowing revelation. In the meantime,
abandon cyberspace and get back to trying to repeal <i>Obamacare</i>. No one can call that a failed political
strategy until the effort actually ends.</span><o:p></o:p></b></span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><b style="color: #134f5c;">"Today the MCR Revolutionary Council remembers Percival 'Midnight' Beeberman and his bold stand in ending the persecution of black cats as a result of the <i>Santa Monica Incident</i>, October 31, 1973." </b><span style="color: #3d85c6;">#meowbitches</span></span></td></tr>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06764990233512291170noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5914379235309520835.post-410758591220198752013-11-22T07:40:00.000-08:002013-11-23T03:20:47.290-08:00The Kobayashi Maru<br />
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<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>The Kobayashi Maru</b></span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>By Emma X</b></span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: medium;">Emma X</b><br /><span style="font-size: xx-small;">The Ship of State is being reprogrammed<br />one legislature at a time, because ultra-</span></span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">Conservatives are in denial about </span></span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;">ideological death.</span><br />
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<b style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I didn't intend to mention Rob Ford in a blog again. Once was necessary, as he was the large
coked-out elephant in the room, so to speak.
But the situation with Mayor Ford, who with brother Doug continues headlining his "<i>Five Star</i> <i>O Canada</i> <i>Grandiose Denial Variety Review"</i>, has caused reasonable questions to be
asked. “Why not just remove the bum from
office?” for example. The answer is, under current Toronto law there is no mechanism to do so.
Common sense says that one should exist.
Canadians are struggling with that problem as we speak.</b><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: medium;"><i>Ford Nation</i>,</b><span style="font-size: xx-small;"> The Ford brothers' news and<br />information show, was cancelled after one<br />episode. Sadly, viewers may never know who<br />won the Shrek look-alike contest. While Mayor<br />Rob Ford remains firmly in denial, amused<br />American observers may not realize it could<br />happen here. The American version of <i>Ford</i><br /><i>Nation</i> may be playing in a political venue<br />near you very soon.</span></span></td></tr>
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<b style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Cut to the great State of Wisconsin, where Conservatives in
the State Assembly last week very quietly passed a proposed Constitutional
amendment that would limit the recall power of constituents. Currently, Wisconsin’s constitution allows
for the recall of any elected official for any reason that the voters see fit,
including no confidence. The proposed
amendment would limit the recall right to only cases where an elected official
is convicted of a felony or an ethics violation. Republicans deemed this move necessary after Governor
Scott Walker came narrowly close to recall last year as a result of his changes
to collective bargaining rights, a successful union busting push. Voters felt betrayed by Walker, who was
elected on a ‘jobs and job creation’ platform.
They initiated an unsuccessful recall move against Walker and several
State Senators.</b></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEijk35wlodS_oJKFB-RiGpBxMW28N18dS-e_EZ9rPHSku_CukhTyXuIaLZxzOo6H_OgThyphenhyphen_w-EY9RR3WntbYK1dJefcUI2HfrCf9kbhs7ulWJbER8dgduyD2If6adrh2oNaMQ_aE87WyrkW/s1600/something+special+from+wisconsin2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEijk35wlodS_oJKFB-RiGpBxMW28N18dS-e_EZ9rPHSku_CukhTyXuIaLZxzOo6H_OgThyphenhyphen_w-EY9RR3WntbYK1dJefcUI2HfrCf9kbhs7ulWJbER8dgduyD2If6adrh2oNaMQ_aE87WyrkW/s400/something+special+from+wisconsin2.jpg" width="298" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><b style="font-size: medium;">The same Cheesehead politicians</b><br /><span style="font-size: xx-small;">who censured a fellow legislator for using the word<br /> 'vagina' are now pushing to protect unpopular Conservative<br />policies and politicians by limiting voter recall rights.<br /> Cheese + Football + Beer + An Inattentive Electorate<br />could equal a permanent Republican foothold in control of<br />Wisconsin State politics. The same statute would<br />limit recalls for county and municipal officials and school<br />board members also. The proposed Constitutional change<br />will come up for a vote in 2014.</span></span></td></tr>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>As you might imagine, the proposed Wisconsin constitutional amendment was passed on
party lines. All Republicans voted for
it, and all Democrats voted against it. Once
again party politics threaten the legal power of voters to keep elected
officials from running rampant through the ideological mine fields of political
territorialism. And as we have seen
before, what is successful in one Conservative State is often repeated in
others.<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: medium;">Hail, Columbia!</b><br /><span style="font-size: xx-small;">Florida Congressman Trey Radel admitted to buying<br />and using cocaine this week. His long term drug use<br />was helped along by taxpayer subsidized trips to<br />Columbia. The Tea Party Representative admits to<br />a problem and says he is getting help. But he did not<br />resign, nor did his Party ask him to. A Conservative<br />vote with a monkey on its back is still a Conservative<br /> vote.</span></span></td></tr>
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<b style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">So we should not be too critical or even amused by the plight
of our Canadian brothers and the Bacchanalian carny show they are trying to deal with up
North. It may turn out to be a <i>Grace of God</i> situation. Not only have we reached a point where
scandalized Western politicians are not willing to consider stepping down from
office for any reason, rational voter recourse may soon be a moot
point as well.</b></div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: medium;">Boldly going where no man has<br />gone before. </b><span style="font-size: xx-small;">Wisconsin State Legislators<br />are pleased with their efforts to entrench<br />Conservative rule for the long term. Ultimately<br />it will come down to the voters, as Republicans<br />are the majority in both State Houses. That's<br />why they continue to focus on Gerrymandering<br />also.<br /><br /><br /></span></span></td></tr>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Republicans are abandoning the 'Southern Strategy' in pursuit of the 'Kobayashi Maru', which is to say, if you can't win the game, change the rules. Forget that the rules are there to protect constituents against the possibility of an American Rob Ford, or worse. In this war the most important thing is to take and hold strategic ground, and make no mistake, it is a war. One in which voter rights are acceptable collateral damage. </b></span><b style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">So we can expect more politicians like Rob Ford or Trey Radel, because things like character and purpose are not even worth lip service when facing full-out ideological battle. But having a partisan ass rooted in a powerful chair that will always vote the Party agenda, now <i>that's </i>government by the people!</b></div>
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<b style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Integrity was always overrated anyway. And what's a little aberrant recreational behavior among well meaning friends? Go Badgers.</b><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: medium;">The voter nuclear option. </b><span style="font-size: xx-small;">This week Senate Democrats voted to allow the 'nuclear option' in clearing Republican filibusters. In so doing they violated their own ethical concerns about precedent. After the government shutdown Americans thought politicians had learned their lesson, but in fact they are opening their arsenals and expanding their offensive. The only option their constituents have is to nuke them at the polls in 2014 and 2016 in hopes of curtailing a longer ideological war.</span></span></td></tr>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06764990233512291170noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5914379235309520835.post-2183047455535541942013-11-16T03:59:00.000-08:002013-11-16T03:59:58.946-08:00Men Behaving Badly, Sports Edition<br />
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<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>Men Behaving Badly, Sports Edition</b></span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>By Emma X</b></span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><b>Emma X</b></span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;">Men need a stronghold to protect against</span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;">the feminization of Western culture. Of</span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;">course, I don't object to the pussification</span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;">of anything.</span></td></tr>
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<span style="color: #134f5c;"><b><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I have to admit, men and women think differently. </span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">And I am no great football fan.</span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> </span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">So take that into account when I tell you, I
don’t get the NFL locker room culture thing.</span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">
</span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">It seems to me that if behavior is wrong outside the arena, it must be
wrong within.</span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> </span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">But again, what do I know?
</span></b></span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> </span><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Men seem to need a place to behave
badly, and one of the last great bastions of the free expression of unfettered
testosterone seems to be the sports locker room.</b></span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: medium;">Not all cultures produce good things,</b><br /><span style="font-size: xx-small;">but current and former members of the NFL are lining<br />up to tell us that what's going on in locker rooms is<br />traditional and harmless. Simply put, that means that<br />it was done to them, and they in turn did it to someone<br />else. That is how cultures are perpetuated and personal<br />image is protected.</span></span></td></tr>
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<span style="color: #134f5c;"><b><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Still, if somebody chooses to call you a half-n*gger on
tape, that is either the greatest expression of cross-racial affection, or one
of the crassest examples of team building correspondence in sports history.</span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">
</span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">In our current culture it’s hard to tell, and that is the basic
problem.</span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> </span></b></span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><b>We have too many sub-cultures
within our melting pot society. Rules of social behavior are badly integrated and too complicated for common understanding.</b></span></span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: medium;">The Red Power Ranger</b><br /><b style="font-size: medium;">in the Room.</b><br /><span style="font-size: xx-small;">At 6'3", 320 lbs. Dolphins left guard<br />Ritchie Incognito is a beast on the field.<br />In all the interviews and cable news<br />chatter about this event, NOBODY has<br />even mentioned the possibility of</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">steroid use as a factor in his socially un-<br />acceptable behavior. Everyone involved<br />agrees that <i>that</i> part of sports culture<br />can never be discussed publicly.</span></span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><b>Miami Dolphins left tackle Jonathan Martin has been soundly
criticized for taking offense to what is understood to be traditional NFL
hazing because he doesn’t understand the culture. All he endured was designed to make him a
better player, to allow him to get tough emotionally while he trains his body to get tough physically. His inability to cope
makes him weak. Making his discomfort
public brands him a rat. Whatever goes
on</b></span> <span style="color: #134f5c;"><b>in that rarefied place of male-on-male dominance is sacred enough to deserve
silence. So shaking down fellow players
for $15,000 in lunch money in sports culture is not playground bullying. It is character building. Those of us outside the culture need to
understand that this is not about traditional right and wrong; this is how a
rookie becomes a veteran. It is how a
boy footballer becomes a man. It is a
beautiful thing.</b></span></span></div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: medium;">Culture protects what a society<br />values. </b><span style="font-size: xx-small;">Once that is understood, there is<br />no conflict of message.</span></span></td></tr>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>But what is Jonathan Miller supposed to know coming in to this
culture? He came from a place where you
stood up to racial slurs and lunch money shake-downs. But once in uniform he is supposed to view the same abuse as tough love. I understand his
confusion and frustration.</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><b>I suppose I could do better contemplating the wisdom of these
sterling right-of-passage traditions if the sport of Football were not
continually draped in public scandal.
But this is a brotherhood whose members have recently been involved in
activities that challenge the culture outside the iconic temple, a list that
includes, but is not limited to, rape, drug rape, spousal abuse, spousal murder,
murder, drug and alcohol abuse, animal abuse, pederasty, cheating, gun running, whoremongering and generally unacceptable social behavior. Of course we should still hold up players as
American heroes. Differences in culture just makes
conversations with the kids a little more complicated, that’s all.</b></span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhl559sr-FFnaqEd9uvBgPFMYZdNmxKRIUTxC6hJoJ6waoJNkogMftGZxrovfLGZvXGEA29jFK8YFjm3roTZSmS_OlgtX_SA_IVKYEntwjf4_8NeCDJDloAmHN3ywiI7YMOFRFstV9njwyM/s1600/injured+dolphins+player1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="212" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhl559sr-FFnaqEd9uvBgPFMYZdNmxKRIUTxC6hJoJ6waoJNkogMftGZxrovfLGZvXGEA29jFK8YFjm3roTZSmS_OlgtX_SA_IVKYEntwjf4_8NeCDJDloAmHN3ywiI7YMOFRFstV9njwyM/s400/injured+dolphins+player1.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: medium;">It's a man's world </b><span style="font-size: xx-small;">where no one escapes<br />without physical, mental or emotional injury. We<br />condone the violence, so why complain about what<br /> it takes emotionally to reach the end zone?</span></span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><span style="color: #134f5c;">Best case, a professional footballer can look forward to a
painful short career where he receives undue adulation and a pass on bad
behavior that will be immediately revoked when he leaves the sport. He will then join our wider culture that
presents more restrictive rules. He will
face civilian life with a raft of physical injuries, including probable brain
injury resulting in massive anger issues and memory loss, and a pair of testicles the size of
peanuts. He will be sporting an ego the
size of Mount Rushmore but will have zero usable business skills. He will face life as a still young man with a
drastic reduction of income and a disproportionate statistically high
probability of shooting himself to death.
But hey, that’s what the locker room culture is for, right? To toughen him up for the game of real life. I’m beginning to see how good it all is now.</span></b></span></div>
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<b><span style="color: #134f5c;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">So the bottom line is I’m not too rigid to learn, or to
embrace fraternal culture. I will therefore leave you with this newly formed message of my
affection: Hey, wassup you half 'whatevers' (</span><i style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">dear reader, please fill in your</i><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> </span><i style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">own racial, gender or intelligence negative identifier</i><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">)? I want to
sh*t in your orifice and slap you and your slut of a mama, with whom I have committed
perverse sexual acts that she loved.
Kill, kill, kill! It’s all out
of a place of love, people. All out of
love. I expect you all to pay for my
Thanksgiving trip to the Bahamas, you worthless little four-eyed Google+ geeky genderless f*cks. When
you have, we will both feel spiritually enhanced, and emotionally more mature. Thanks for reading.</span></span></b><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhjMTfYr7KOlL3GvdJjWMhubp0F39-WnkT2gcyiqNIMBpoYuSLHGb5xZrJuXHdBEIg4QyyS42ZKNb0GfbQGmQAII5oGXaN8-XSPEuEuyxjUroIl6NkNMBV5i8qw2CrlNugvjef2C0ShU3mD/s1600/romans1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="452" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhjMTfYr7KOlL3GvdJjWMhubp0F39-WnkT2gcyiqNIMBpoYuSLHGb5xZrJuXHdBEIg4QyyS42ZKNb0GfbQGmQAII5oGXaN8-XSPEuEuyxjUroIl6NkNMBV5i8qw2CrlNugvjef2C0ShU3mD/s640/romans1.jpg" width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: medium;">The Roman's loved blood sport, </b><span style="font-size: xx-small;">and so do we. We just imagine ourselves to be a bit more civilized. We don't want to make direct association with the resulting emotional carnage. If that happened, we might have to question our cultural values.</span></span></td></tr>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06764990233512291170noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5914379235309520835.post-86853629764844261632013-11-09T04:04:00.000-08:002013-11-09T04:04:50.226-08:00Breaking Bold<br />
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<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>Breaking Bold</b></span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>By Emma X</b></span><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgnspq6NHprVJVmg4BMirB1VyVxdkBrIDbCpRb7sYrK1cmZ9OZLLRis6PoY7kjJF8OMLfMRRsaZPtdwphNQcUNtY4hUwWW7J_LL5l75VLlJrYOKcF1-8ApizxmyskQIFqVpQUeYPZjOp_ix/s1600/emma1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="314" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgnspq6NHprVJVmg4BMirB1VyVxdkBrIDbCpRb7sYrK1cmZ9OZLLRis6PoY7kjJF8OMLfMRRsaZPtdwphNQcUNtY4hUwWW7J_LL5l75VLlJrYOKcF1-8ApizxmyskQIFqVpQUeYPZjOp_ix/s320/emma1.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: medium;">Emma X</b><br /><span style="font-size: xx-small;">There are no bad politicians. There<br />are just bad choices.</span></span></td></tr>
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<b style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">By now I’m sure you have heard that Mayor Rob Ford of Toronto was finally forced to admit that he smoked crack cocaine. After denying the allegation for months, the
existence of a video of the unfortunate event forced Mr. Ford to come clean with his
constituency. His excuse was classic. He didn’t remember smoking the illegal
substance because he was roaring drunk at the time. Whew!
What a relief for the citizens of Toronto. Your mayor is not a chronic crack head. He is just a blackout drunk. So if would-be terrorists will please politely adjust to the Mayor’s life
style and attack during the normal Monday through Friday work week when Ford is
presumably sober, denizens of the fourth largest city in North America will sleep
soundly in their beds. No worries here.</b><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgO_Kd0NDclwDbdtSXr7fZpGxy1upC-McrwINObH9d751egpThGcsnBeC3dE7lgad7x11dHj4kiaCUqHq7CZmsXXlA5xcT7eEPnU1Ffz50WOJo7pu_e424Gdzcm4eGMgWJSR1c3tRNwAN8O/s1600/rob+ford5.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgO_Kd0NDclwDbdtSXr7fZpGxy1upC-McrwINObH9d751egpThGcsnBeC3dE7lgad7x11dHj4kiaCUqHq7CZmsXXlA5xcT7eEPnU1Ffz50WOJo7pu_e424Gdzcm4eGMgWJSR1c3tRNwAN8O/s400/rob+ford5.jpg" width="300" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: medium;">The Right Honorable<br />Mayor Rob Ford</b><span style="font-size: xx-small;"> on a sober day.<br />His example may be a good object lesson<br />for impressionable Canadian children.</span></span></td></tr>
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<b style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The tape of Mr. Ford smoking a rock in a known crack house was
seized with other evidence in an illegal gun bust. The good Mayor did not mention that he broke
the law he is sworn to uphold, just that he used some bad judgment. I mean, we’ve all been there, right? I can’t count the number of times I have been caught
smoking with gun runners in a known crack house. Anyway, how he got to the establishment, and
mention of the company he keeps were not part of his <i>Mea Culpa</i>. He will not step
down from office, and he will not promise to quit drinking. He merely suggests that everyone get over it,
while he gets back to the work he loves.</b></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhUK9sitWGO7xBM9eO0Z624re30olZL1l5CQSBZfPfvkm3FBTFhR5Xg2Wp43OcxLlwhhOkdcTH8kqeoBxgVZqB1Xgq7So3xVpIXxIR-WwBqmvlJyTGMRfsf1YLAdW6I-raAfWHqkAJAkKqH/s1600/rob+ford+partying1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="172" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhUK9sitWGO7xBM9eO0Z624re30olZL1l5CQSBZfPfvkm3FBTFhR5Xg2Wp43OcxLlwhhOkdcTH8kqeoBxgVZqB1Xgq7So3xVpIXxIR-WwBqmvlJyTGMRfsf1YLAdW6I-raAfWHqkAJAkKqH/s400/rob+ford+partying1.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: medium;">He seemed such a quiet man.</b><br /><span style="font-size: xx-small;">Nobody could have possibly seen this thing coming.<br />Instead of "who would you like to have a beer with?"<br />Canadian voters must also decide who they would<br />prefer to smoke a rock with. It's just another<br />option. After all, the motto of Toronto is<br />"Diversity-Our-Strength".</span></span></td></tr>
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<b style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The icing on this reprehensible cup cake is that he made his
confession at City Hall on <i>‘Bring Your
Child</i> <i>to Work Day’.</i></b></div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: medium;">Yes, sweetheart, the world is a<br />scary place</b><span style="font-size: xx-small;"> and the people making decisions<br />about your life and well-being are drunk and corrupt.<br />Now that you've met the Mayor, let's go get some<br />ice cream.</span></span></td></tr>
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<b style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">When I was a child I thought that our leaders must be the
smartest people in the world. How else
could they reach such an important level of responsibility? With the wisdom of age I came to find out, as
we all eventually do, that our leaders and elected officials can be far from responsible. Any well connected person can gain
office. Their motives can be
self-serving. Their ethics can be
questionable. They can be intellectual
underachievers, narcissists, extremists, mobsters, alcoholics, womanizers, flashers, married
closeted gays, bullies, crack smokers, thieves, pathological liars or sociopaths. And since sour cream also rises to the top,
many of our most prominent statesmen could proudly be all of the above.</b></div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: medium;">It was just a Crackcident</b><span style="font-size: xx-small;"> and it won't<br />happen again. For some personalities, any attention,<br />even negative attention, serves an unfulfilled need.</span></span></td></tr>
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<b style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Not every politician is morally corrupt, of course. But those trying to serve their
community are soon perverted by the system or weeded out. Early on they come to realize that they are cogs in a
political machine fueled by patronage and cronyism. So I suppose the end of constituent innocence can’t
happen too soon. <i>‘Bring</i> <i>Your Child to Work Day’</i>
may be an appropriate object lesson in this freakish political age. We
should think of it as ‘<i>Scared Straight’</i>
for future voters.</b></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>This is not about the good citizens of Canada.
Rob Ford didn’t invent anything. <i>There
is nothing new under the sun</i>. But in the
past, once caught in an illegal and embarrassing act, a politician’s career was over. They would resign immediately. Now we enable them with the option of two weeks in rehab
with weekends off, and deem that sufficient time and energy to atone for any public
faux pas. The Rob Ford story is just another ludicrous
example of the death of shame in Western culture.</b></span><o:p></o:p></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>By the way, Mr. Ford's approval rating went up after his heart-felt public confession. We get the government we deserve, folks. Indeed we do.</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i>Postscript: On Friday another video was released of Ford revealing his mastery of the F-word in a drunken rage, a performance suggesting that his drug use might not be a one-off. Clearly Mr. Ford needs help. We sincerely hope he finds it outside of public office.</i></span></div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><b>Yabba Dabba Jabba</b></span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;">Ya koon tacha poonoo nee sah.</span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;">Ya ee eema loh kah yah lee.</span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;">No biggie, eh? Welcome to Toronto.</span></td></tr>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06764990233512291170noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5914379235309520835.post-81533774475028528562013-11-02T04:02:00.000-07:002013-11-02T04:03:52.647-07:00Hot Swapping<br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><span style="color: red; font-size: large;">By Emma X</span><span style="color: #134f5c;"><o:p></o:p></span></b></span></div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><b style="font-size: medium;">If Obama can't get it up by<br />Thanksgiving </b><span style="font-size: xx-small;">website failure may<br />defund his flagship health care program. He<br />claims his enrollment Blackhawk is down<br />temporarily due to stress. He hopes this<br /> infelicitous flaccidity will be resolved by<br />late November, allowing celebratory holiday<br />penetration of participating insurance vendors<br />by qualified participants.</span></span></td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: medium;">Emma X</b><br /><span style="font-size: xx-small;">America still leads the world in<br />technology and political failures.</span></span></td></tr>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>It is a truth universally acknowledged that a bureaucratic
government in possession of a critically important software roll out will fail
to load test.<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: medium;">Obamacare Death Panels</b><span style="font-size: xx-small;"> turned<br />out to be servers that could not support the<br />load generated by poorly integrated software.</span></span></td></tr>
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<b style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">That being said, one has to come to the conclusion that God
does indeed love Republicans. Or maybe
he hates universal health care. Whatever
the reason, we now have airways full of government appointed Luddites
explaining why they didn’t understand that software components designed by
multiple vendors might not work when integrated, or that multiple thousands of
people trying to access a single website at one time might crash the server. We unfortunately have come to expect these
kinds of idiotic government failures, but in a twenty-first century economy where commercial
systems work seamlessly to keep American commerce functioning at a world class pace,
the <i>Obamacare</i> rollout is embarrassingly
quaint. Failure was highly
avoidable. But then the government process
itself tends to collapse under stress.
The American electorate now fully understands that it has a government
that cannot legislate; that it also cannot function in the technical arena
should be no surprise.</b></div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: medium;">Load Tested and Approved.</b><br /><span style="font-size: xx-small;">The NSA has proved that it can process huge<br />volumes of data seamlessly and efficiently.<br />Why not interrupt monitored domestic calls<br />to offer access to the health care marketplace?<br />They already have the basic enrollment<br />information for every qualifying American<br />citizen. And every German citizen, for that<br />matter. And world-wide Yahoo and Google<br />users...</span></span></td></tr>
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<b style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">So now we have a Health Care Enrollment system that is
limping along with daily hot swapping of code and no end-to-end system
testing. We can look forward to some
serious hacking exposures, both short term and long. And it may not be long before the loyal
opposition is rightly proclaiming data security risks, and possibly some
successes with illegal enrollment data acquisition.</b></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhFye28wxMBB_foqb8HLk9Dr0_FMgG9FxE1HDAglEjRYPvbhx6B0MdJaRX2dSJYz8vwB0K8ErHSLiTsCWMVa5yrO72gfhSAcQgN0g2LXGgM29QgTSQw6H7JRdG90xK0fSonFIkAbhXtTuhy/s1600/hot+swapping+of+politicians1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="338" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhFye28wxMBB_foqb8HLk9Dr0_FMgG9FxE1HDAglEjRYPvbhx6B0MdJaRX2dSJYz8vwB0K8ErHSLiTsCWMVa5yrO72gfhSAcQgN0g2LXGgM29QgTSQw6H7JRdG90xK0fSonFIkAbhXtTuhy/s400/hot+swapping+of+politicians1.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: medium;">Wetware Hot Swap</b><br /><span style="font-size: xx-small;">Wouldn't it be more efficient if we could change<br />out disfunctional politicians while the legislative<br /> system remained up? Productivity and functionality<br /> would improve immediately.</span></span></td></tr>
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<b style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The <i>Obamacare</i> rollout is working as well as the
legislative process that created it. In the victory wake of a government shutdown blamed on Republicans, the Democrats have handed them a spectacular public start-up failure that conservatives can attach to a negative public
perception of the legislation itself. They
have hot swapped an historical triumph for an embarrassing technical defeat.</b></div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: medium;">The Victory Lap</b><br /><span style="font-size: xx-small;">Republicans tried every method to<br />derail <i>Obamacare</i>. Help finally came<br />from an unexpected source.</span></span></td></tr>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Still, one day soon people will be able to use that new-fangled system of tubes and pipes held together by electrician's tape called <i>The Internet</i> to shop for affordable health care. In the meantime pick up the phone and call for assistance. It won't get you health insurance any faster, but it will give you time on hold to consider how well your January enrollment might work, and what medical supplies you might want to stock up on, just in case.</b></span></div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><b style="font-size: medium;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The Bright Future Of Affordable<br />Health Care.</span></b><br /><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;">There will be seven million registered applicants<br />by March, 2014. Guaranteed.</span></span></td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: small; font-weight: bold;">Kept in the dark and fed bullsh*t?</span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;"> President Obama knew nothing about problems with the <i>Obamacare </i>website roll out. He also knew nothing about controversial IRS or NSA activities. Loyal public servants protect their President. But if his chronic lack of awareness is real, he should be officially titled <i>Mushroom in Chief</i>. 21st Century politicians need to learn that the technology of the day does not allow for explainable lapses in oversight. Either way, Angela Merkel is about to impart to him the need for high level executive accountability in all things technical. Sadly, <i>Obamacare</i> does not provide insurance against political embarrassment, domestic or foreign.</span></span></td></tr>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06764990233512291170noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5914379235309520835.post-52383342623163635172013-10-19T03:45:00.000-07:002013-10-19T03:45:56.244-07:00<br />
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<span style="color: red; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><b>Purity and Committment</b></span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><b>By Emma X</b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><b><br /></b></span>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: red; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><b style="font-size: medium;">Emma X</b></span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><b style="font-size: medium;"><br /></b>Start up or start over?</span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">Be forewarned. Your government<br />power supply may fail again in 90<br />days. Make sure you have backup.</span></span></td></tr>
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<b><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Hey, the country is back in business. At least for 90 days. Just time enough to get your holiday shopping
done, and then get your survival preparation ready for round two. Or is it three? I’m losing count. Mitch McConnell says what we just went
through won’t happen again. Ted Cruz
says don’t bet on it.</span></b><br />
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<b><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="color: #134f5c;">The thing about ideologues is that they won’t allow
themselves to give up. They are getting
too much gratification from their own activist base. They enjoy the spotlight, and they enjoy the
thrill of brinkmanship. As soon as the adrenaline
rush from this most recent fiasco wears off, they will be back for more action.</span><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><b style="font-size: medium;">The Silence of Ted Cruz</b><br /><span style="font-size: xx-small;">should not be expected any time soon, although</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">his Party tried to contain him.<br /><i>"Will the Tea Party be chastised by recent defeat?<br />Not likely, or not for long. Because Tea Party<br />members inhabit an alternative political reality--<br />sheltered in safe districts or states, applauded by<br />Conservative media, incited (or threatened) by<br />advocacy groups, carried along by a deep current<br />of anger and frustration among activists--they<br />have no incentive to view defeat as defeat. In fact,<br />turning against tactical radicalism would involve<br />serious political risk. So every setback is interpreted<br />as a need for greater purity and commitment."</i><br />--Michael Gerson, The Washington Post</span></span></td></tr>
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<b><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">So what do we know now that we didn’t know a week ago? Well, it should be crystal clear to everyone
that Congress is a house divided, and as both Abraham Lincoln and <i>The Bible</i>
tell us, <i>it will not stand</i>. John Boehner will go down in history as
possibly the weakest <i>Speaker of the House</i>
ever. There is no ‘too far’ for the Tea Party. The rest of the world, including our economic
allies, will be looking for fiscal stability elsewhere. And unless there is a significant voter
mandated change in 2014, economic recovery for the middle class is in jeopardy. Why do I say this? Because the swing votes needed to prevent disaster were garnered under extreme duress. There are no real defenders of the American people in<i> The House. </i> Just very bad chess players.</span></b></div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><b style="font-size: medium;"><span style="color: #134f5c;">Splat!</span></b><br /><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="color: #134f5c;">As God is my witness, I thought </span>elephants could fly!<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /></span></span></td></tr>
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<b><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">But please don’t let my cynicism spoil your appreciation for
the titanic loss incurred by the Republican Party over the past few weeks. They failed in everything they were trying to
build. The real precipice they stood on was
not the fiscal cliff, but the edge of voter confidence. At the last minute some recognized the danger and clung to their grass roots to break their fall. But
others, buoyed by a blood-thirsty anti-government frenzy, jumped headlong over the edge believing
they would bounce. I know
many of you out there frustrated with the theatrics are eagerly waiting to hear the resounding splat. Congratulations. Today is your day.</span></b></div>
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<b><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">But the survivors will not be deterred. They are not afraid of going over the edge. They believe with all of their heart that the philosophical bubble they live in will break their fall. They just need to go home and pump it up a little. More hot air will make them buoyant again.</span></b></div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><b style="font-size: x-large;">The De-evolution of Republican Man</b><br />What most of see as a fifteen year progression of repeated error and bad judgement, Republicans feel is a mere redefinition of </span><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: xx-small;"><span style="color: #134f5c;">political identity. They still feel their policies are sound, which is why they will lose even more support in 2014. The Tea Party views their role as destiny, and the mainstream Republican machine as a convenient tool to help them reach their goal. Cliffhanging is no big deal. They have spent the last two weeks telling us just that. Stock up on canned tuna and fresh water. We may all have to hunker down again.</span></span></td></tr>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06764990233512291170noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5914379235309520835.post-40997385058137000832013-10-12T04:18:00.000-07:002013-10-12T04:29:06.167-07:00<br />
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<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">The Greatest Gerrymander</span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">By Nebu Ganesh</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><b><span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: small;">Nebu Ganesh,<br />Progressive Potentate</span></b><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;">Go ahead and give grandpa a call. Listen</span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;">to his complaints about his bursitis. It</span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;">just may save the world economy.</span></td></tr>
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<b><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">As we sit waiting for someone in Washington to blink, we are left to contemplate who is happy about this House of Representatives cluster f*ck that is giving a whole nation angina. I mean we know about the <i>Founding Funders</i> and their special interest people, and the anarchist Tea Party Congresspeople skipping from newscam to newscam with school kid glee. But who are those stalwart 5%* of 'normal' people represented on polls who think that things are hunky dory in Congress right now? Well the demographic for the Tea Party, after you subtract the Jesus Apocalypse freaks and inbred southern gun runners, is basically white men over 55. I would guess way over 55, but that is the number with the inbreds and the paranoiacs off their meds factored in. Let's just be politically incorrect and say <i>old people</i>, where 'old people' refers to a state of mind rather than biological age, and I will just admit bias because the only place I hear the Tea Party litany spouted these days is from old white devotees of FOX News. You know, the sexy babes that are excited that Rupert Murdoch is single again. I'm sorry to wound Liberal readers with these prejudicial statements. But some <i>old people </i>in this country think that Congress is moving in the right direction, and they are home all day responding to pollsters.</span></b><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: medium;">The Next to Greatest Generation</b><br /><span style="font-size: xx-small;">has a message for you. "<i>You have been a great</i><br /><i>disappointment to us. We are leaving our money<br />to cat shelters, because you don't deserve what<br />we earned. Why couldn't you have applied<br />yourself in Junior College and grown up smart<br />like that nice Teddy Cruz? He loves his father."</i></span></span></td></tr>
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<span style="color: #134f5c;"><b><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">This, the Greatest Generation and their not so great first born sons have lived long enough to see just about everything, so why not the end of the Global Market Economy? Theirs will be the first and last generations to ride the wave of government entitlement programs from start to finish with no diminishment in terms or services. In fact, their government perks have improved sweetly over the decades, because this group has always voted for politicians who promote their financial interests. And why not? Their social benefits were earned, they believe. Ours were not.</span></b></span><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhct6TaOzTzNGk6MjXmo2oeXsLOU-5aagJixP_5_mpntezJ4CajiYZqgRCajZkeNXsWJYDPpUw1R5NtnyO6xhTEQ29xf82kOoB9fBAegicijaBdRQ6Y3hlFbBb31QolCEBJY5xfjjNTmdvu/s1600/old+people3.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhct6TaOzTzNGk6MjXmo2oeXsLOU-5aagJixP_5_mpntezJ4CajiYZqgRCajZkeNXsWJYDPpUw1R5NtnyO6xhTEQ29xf82kOoB9fBAegicijaBdRQ6Y3hlFbBb31QolCEBJY5xfjjNTmdvu/s400/old+people3.jpg" width="302" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: medium;">Might as well let 'er rip.</b><br /><span style="font-size: xx-small;">who cares about health insurance<br />at this point? Especially yours.</span></span></td></tr>
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<span style="color: #134f5c;"><b><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">This same mighty generation came back from World War II and the Asian wars with PTSD and alcohol dependency, for which there were no Socialist government support programs. They were men of their times, and their times were racist. They are not all geriatric Yodas spouting the wisdom of the ages. Some of them are spouting some pretty hateful things, and voting their angry minds. They can do so without fear, because no politician in more than thirty years has passed legislation that would touch their entitlements. Their generation is exempted in every proposal to change <i>Social Security</i> or <i>Medicare</i>. They've got <i>Social Program Fiscal Tenure</i>, if you will. So they can watch you hang. And they might just enjoy that, since you never text your grandma anymore.</span></b></span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><b>Selective Social Shame</b></span><br /><span style="font-size: xx-small;">John McCain gave his fellow lawmakers<br />hell this week about the denial of military<br />death benefits for active duty veterans.<br />He told them that Obamacare was a done<br />deal because of the results of the last<br />election, and said his fellow Republicans<br />should be ashamed of leading America<br />down this path. He has never felt shame<br />about bringing Sarah Palin to the political<br />forefront, though. The Tea Party really<br />took off after McCain introduced her as a<br />viable Vice Presidential candidate. Main-<br />stream Republicans aided and abetted the<br />Tea Party view, enjoying their antics and<br />often repeating their rhetoric when it<br />seemed advantageous to do so, and they</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">used them to try to sway elections, as</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">McCain himself did. There is even more<br />shame to go around than he currently<br />calculates.</span></span></td></tr>
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<b><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">They worked 40 years of double shifts at the foundry to give you and your ungrateful parents a leg up in life. And for what? So that your liberal education could cause you to question everything they believe in and fought for? So that their hard earned money can be redistributed by the government to a generation of foul-mouthed upstarts who can't keep their pants up? They conquered the Hun and put Communism in check but their thanks is getting to listen to you spout off about Bono and <i>Progressive</i> <i>Humanism</i>? No wonder they're angry.</span></b><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: medium;">I still like Ike.</b><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><b> </b>That sweet blonde lady on FOX</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: medium;"> </b><span style="font-size: xx-small;">News says that a debt ceiling default won't amount<br />to much, just like our grand kids. Its the same with<br />global warming. We came through the Dust Bowl<br />all right. Liberals are just a bunch of wimps. We'll<br />keep voting Tea Party. It's the best way to keep more<br />pansies from getting in to Congress.</span></span></td></tr>
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<b style="color: #134f5c;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Now I'm not saying that your right-leaning elders are vindictive. I'm sure your granny is very sweet and loves you very much. But they are uncomfortable in the current culture. Can we say it? They are racially prejudiced. They are fearful, and therefore easily led. And because the world they understood is in fact gone forever, they are angry. They think that we have made crap out of everything they fought to save, and maybe they're right. FOX News tells them that they are, and a little geriatric empowerment can be refreshingly meaningful as they pause to reflect on life's rewards, or lack of them.</span></b><br />
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>So they can let your Liberal agenda crash and burn. They have lived through much worse, and think that a good Depression may help build in you that strength of character you sadly lack. Just one word of warning to the Tea Party, though. Touch those <i>Social Security</i> checks at your own peril. Remove one, <i>just one</i>, of their <i>Medicare</i> benefits, and you'll be looking down the barrel of German Mauser liberated from the cold hand of a former member of the Wehrmacht at Normandy. That would certainly qualify as a justifying reason for the Founding Fathers giving us the Second Amendment. Age brings clarity, you know.</b></span><br />
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace; font-size: xx-small;"><b>* The AP poll released Wednesday, 10/09/13 reports the current Congressional Approval Rating to be a whopping 5%, the lowest in history. Stand proud, America. We put those underachieving morons in office!</b></span><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg874z5nnhIkqAj-A1SQilEL1pnB2-xLfbegWDTn9C3gJv9zEm0882Cqq39mxdeqwp2GwzPLGN4hTRk7IjbyKzaM3T02ceEoQO-Bilhgvcm5A66ynZRvmrEI9eFJg_K-1D6R-p7Ft_pkAPo/s1600/ANGRY+OLD+PEOPLE1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="472" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg874z5nnhIkqAj-A1SQilEL1pnB2-xLfbegWDTn9C3gJv9zEm0882Cqq39mxdeqwp2GwzPLGN4hTRk7IjbyKzaM3T02ceEoQO-Bilhgvcm5A66ynZRvmrEI9eFJg_K-1D6R-p7Ft_pkAPo/s640/ANGRY+OLD+PEOPLE1.jpg" width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: medium;">The tea knives are out. </b><span style="font-size: xx-small;">Tea Party elders want you to know that they're not dead yet, and they vote. Even after they're dead, they will continue to vote in Ohio, Texas and Florida. They are the Americans that the Tea Party says don't want <i>Obamacare</i>, and they are a big part of the reason that your economy will be in the sh*tter next week. You can argue about it with them when you are all drunk at Thanksgiving.</span></span></td></tr>
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06764990233512291170noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5914379235309520835.post-79676873036809996262013-10-05T05:17:00.000-07:002013-10-05T05:17:47.169-07:00<br />
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<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">All or Nothing</span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">By Emma X</span><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhPIG9Ki9BZ5q_KmMMs9XjjyTxEkMr9UpSMMuiBGwiG_5vgwG_aEuSXzITcoe9qStalCjjDHN6HolOH9bWDsqATfWkmJPzxy50twPMgTkbOhkY6XnowENU8HBA-wn41RDY07SEIMBz3DzZc/s1600/stop+button+byline1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhPIG9Ki9BZ5q_KmMMs9XjjyTxEkMr9UpSMMuiBGwiG_5vgwG_aEuSXzITcoe9qStalCjjDHN6HolOH9bWDsqATfWkmJPzxy50twPMgTkbOhkY6XnowENU8HBA-wn41RDY07SEIMBz3DzZc/s320/stop+button+byline1.jpg" width="247" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: red;"><b><span style="font-size: small;">Emma X</span></b><br />If there was a shut down button<br />for Congress, I'd push it. I wish a<br />government shut down defunded<br />political rhetoric.</span></td></tr>
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<b><span style="color: #134f5c;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Well folks, they did it.
</span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">They shut it down.</span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> </span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Not that we
didn’t know it would happen, but it is still pretty amazing to think that our Congressional Representatives are leaders of the free world.</span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> </span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Do you ever wonder why the rest of the planet
thinks we are stupid ignorant narcissistic jerks?</span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">
</span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Take a look at the 113</span><sup style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">th</sup><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> Congress.</span></span></b><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgWtmW5Wq-Vz49PVeUY19bCVjTV52KrGCp3exTqPpWQ90h2EkrVhsXr-ciOeqTDLh9ujRW8hA_28lLJjBAnrrDRQkJjlFUwiT1HkUtH47WNSebnAAKME3BKR0KWS2RgLvNw8LeJzU3U4RFc/s1600/congressional+portrait1+copy.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="317" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgWtmW5Wq-Vz49PVeUY19bCVjTV52KrGCp3exTqPpWQ90h2EkrVhsXr-ciOeqTDLh9ujRW8hA_28lLJjBAnrrDRQkJjlFUwiT1HkUtH47WNSebnAAKME3BKR0KWS2RgLvNw8LeJzU3U4RFc/s400/congressional+portrait1+copy.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: medium;">Official Portrait of the 113th Congress.</b><br /><span style="font-size: xx-small;">A bigger parade of self-aggrandizing sphincters you<br />will not find anywhere. America is truly exceptional.</span></span></td></tr>
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<b><span style="color: #134f5c;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">So we don’t know how long it will go on, or who will blink
first, but make no mistake, the perpetrators of this fiasco do not feel your
pain, nor would they respond kindly if they did.</span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> </span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">War planners calculate for an acceptable amount
of collateral damage, and </span><i style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Big Business</i><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">
has rendered themselves untouchable in this economy.</span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> </span><i style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">They
have theirs</i><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">.</span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> </span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">This is about
power.</span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> </span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The concerns of small businesses
and the American people in general have not been a factor in this ideological debate for
ten years, despite the ‘we the people’ rhetoric that is tossed to the crowd like cheap candy and plastic beads.</span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> </span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">This is a battle between <i>Big Government</i> and <i>Big Business </i>masked as a personal freedoms debate, and
you might be shocked to know what the millionaire mercenaries in Congress are willing to take
down to win.</span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> </span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">You got a small taste this
week.</span></span></b><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgrz0fUXYdhj_jlv28QG6w_2Cx-hW9_JUP_WRkwQl4PQLQr8VzXTCcXZH3Un95zAq6elMEaSZGrA53nG0Fiz0tiAk2Aa068d8zfgNiGokrfrhBI-f8_b4wx1NbdaRziHPlGoXviWTzpA7up/s1600/fat+guy+with+pizza1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="308" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgrz0fUXYdhj_jlv28QG6w_2Cx-hW9_JUP_WRkwQl4PQLQr8VzXTCcXZH3Un95zAq6elMEaSZGrA53nG0Fiz0tiAk2Aa068d8zfgNiGokrfrhBI-f8_b4wx1NbdaRziHPlGoXviWTzpA7up/s400/fat+guy+with+pizza1.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: medium;">Tea Party Big Insurance patrons</b><br /><span style="font-size: xx-small;">feel that Federal Government interference in the industry<br /> will ruin profits and take the food right out of their mouths.<br />They've got the time and resources to wait this thing out,</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">though. If their Congressmen don't perform, they'll<br />buy new ones. The goal is to be just like Wall Street;</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">too big and entrenched to fail.</span></span></td></tr>
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<b style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">So who is ahead so far?
Well, nobody. But both sides
claim righteous indignation. Polls
before and after the default blame Republicans, but they are whining all over
the airways, decrying misplaced culpability.
They tried 42 times to repeal Obamacare.
They took the issue all the way to the Supreme Court. They launched an expensive several month media
ad campaign to convince America that Obamacare is a Socialist evil. They told us for several months that they
would shut down the government to defund it.
Then they did<i>. Now they claim they didn’t do it, Obama did</i>. They are having tantrums like two-year-olds in
public. Not exactly a winning
posture. So I guess we have to award the
first blood strike to the Democrats, even though it was self-inflicted by the
Tea Party. Despite all expensive efforts
to defeat it, Obamacare is now law. And ironically, it is funded.</b></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhiHBFuNskzPddRaZ3VJiUxiN8BHgP1oFwvXLgmIjDngi2PnoLhMtvbtcSz2RBAuprVsb0wAIaPTlbt5BUoh_Yk7xs9pmJpnA3ljRVSOjN1OQ2rlhwOyvTo4G2F4_ioR8n4q_Zpxpy-RgOO/s1600/mcconnell-thumb.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhiHBFuNskzPddRaZ3VJiUxiN8BHgP1oFwvXLgmIjDngi2PnoLhMtvbtcSz2RBAuprVsb0wAIaPTlbt5BUoh_Yk7xs9pmJpnA3ljRVSOjN1OQ2rlhwOyvTo4G2F4_ioR8n4q_Zpxpy-RgOO/s320/mcconnell-thumb.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: medium;">Mitch McConnell </b><span style="font-size: xx-small;">says that<br />the Democrats have rejected reasonable<br />legislative compromises. Conserva-<br />tives offered to <i>defeat</i>, then <i>defund,</i><br />and then<i> delay </i>implementation. I<br />guess those three 'Ds' are the new<br />working definition of Republican<br />middle ground. They are actually say-<br />ing what they proposed throughout this<br />whole debacle is a middle ground position.<br />If you press against your temples firmly<br />with both hands right now, your head may<br /> not explode.</span></span></td></tr>
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<b style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Conservatives claim that the President refused to cooperate
with them. I don’t know how you
negotiate with playground bullies.
What? <i>I’ll give you half of my lunch money and one of my sneakers, now go</i>
<i>away and don’t come back?</i> But I have to say that the Obama
Administration did a pitiful job of educating the American people about
Obamacare, allowing the Tea Party to spread their stock in trade lies,
confusion, and fear.</b></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>The 1995 government shutdown lasted over three weeks, with
terrible political repercussions for Republicans. This one looks to last longer, considering
the atmosphere of gridlock that has permeated the last two Congressional
sessions, and the general spirit of meanness that pervades the process. Tea Party candidates are beholden to no one
but their patrons, so they have nothing to lose, including their
Gerrymandered House seats. On October 17<sup>th</sup>
America defaults on its debt. At that
time the Treasury will not be able to honor U.S. financial commitments. That’s when the elephant shit hits the proverbial
world-wide fan. That is when your
investments and retirement take a hit, and your job may be in jeopardy. But if you wish, you will still be able to sign up
for cheaper health insurance. How
whimsical.<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhfnP0fl3z-wpoHLT3UjzIdRq4rMPHRFNTRsRGulf-ZDlTfI6pNwSTkr7pm8O8UkpiVdhKqvma7zHI-arxd0Njg47kGRZUVgAeluEyoJa3cg5Ej7uBDPcRPmW16-kSldlBajMdUUzGRrXRI/s1600/the+plan1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="288" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhfnP0fl3z-wpoHLT3UjzIdRq4rMPHRFNTRsRGulf-ZDlTfI6pNwSTkr7pm8O8UkpiVdhKqvma7zHI-arxd0Njg47kGRZUVgAeluEyoJa3cg5Ej7uBDPcRPmW16-kSldlBajMdUUzGRrXRI/s400/the+plan1.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: medium;">Here's the plan. </b><span style="font-size: xx-small;">When the Tea Party<br />is finished screwing the main stream<br />Republican caucus, they will buck that pesky<br />middle class off of their backs for good.<br />Hang on tight, folks. They've been<br />fantasizing about doing this for a decade.</span></span></td></tr>
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<b style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: #134f5c;">Unfortunately for Conservative
legislators there is no political party health insurance. Tea Party politics introduced an aggressive
deadly cancer into their core that has metastasized without treatment, and
gently put, the Republican Party should be getting their affairs in order. Their odds of survival as they stand are minimal. The American electorate is confused, but it
does not have Alzheimer’s. We will
remember this feces-hurling hate-fest in 2014 and 2016.</span></b></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhhyPzfEinbYf3_Q6SLkpfFYyI4eROVC0bQYs2N1GeH_K-nmRM1TaMmCbH-V8y5rv3CUcsFcf-dZh97oXXTYPt9MbWQDCrF5HGxCFMNcs-UTckz8VuoG4B0qvpJh1ZA9mWeOsQ8yxmhvc5a/s1600/elephant+graveyard+tour1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="416" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhhyPzfEinbYf3_Q6SLkpfFYyI4eROVC0bQYs2N1GeH_K-nmRM1TaMmCbH-V8y5rv3CUcsFcf-dZh97oXXTYPt9MbWQDCrF5HGxCFMNcs-UTckz8VuoG4B0qvpJh1ZA9mWeOsQ8yxmhvc5a/s640/elephant+graveyard+tour1.jpg" width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: medium;">Its the beginning of the end, </b><span style="font-size: xx-small;">and time for the hard liners to start heading toward the place where failed political ideologies go to die. The careers of leading politicians involved in this fiasco will not survive. For the others, it will be best to establish a new generational identity.</span></span></td></tr>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06764990233512291170noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5914379235309520835.post-18938049867009814822013-09-28T04:12:00.002-07:002013-09-28T04:12:52.473-07:00<br />
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<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Uninspected Green Eggs and</span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Genetically Altered Corn-Fed Ham</span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">By Emma X</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><b>Emma X</b></span><br />I do not like green eggs<br />and ham. I would not<br />like them anywhere. I'll<br />eat the mouse, though.<br />You can have <i>The House.</i></span><br />
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>As of this writing Ted Cruz is conducting a pseudo filibuster to
defund <i>Obamacare.</i> Ted has vowed to do anything he can to end
the horror. I’m sure by Friday Ted’s one
man crusade will be over. Odds are the
whole show will come down to one more failed attempt to persuade the Senate to defund. But Ted is a crusader. He's in it for the long haul. His real mission is to rally the troops and
prepare them for the greater conflict to come.<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><b>Tough Talking Ted-I-am</b></span><br /><span style="font-size: xx-small;">Ted's unappetizing meal comes with a cup of hot</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">steaming Tea Party. Most Americans understand<br />the issues, but disagree with the extreme solu-<br />tion. Ted thinks that if he talks long enough we<br />will all bite, and like Dr. Seuss' suddenly<br />enlightened gourmand, thank him later.</span></span></td></tr>
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<b style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">It will give Ted and his supporters a real thrill to vote against raising the debt ceiling. It will
excite them to cause chaos with the government payroll and anxiety about global financing. They are ideologues, and their prime mission is
to end<i> Big Government</i> forever, and leave the workings of America to free markets. No more
regulations. No more coddling of poor
minorities. No more interference in the natural
order of violent world revolution, at least where there is no money to be
made. They believe wholly and
sincerely in the righteousness of the effort, and in the well deserved intrinsic and monetary
rewards owed to a liberated industrial ruling class.</b></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>To this point people may not have taken them seriously. The antics and rhetoric of the Tea Party have
often crossed over to lunacy. But the
lunatics have now taken over a whole wing of the asylum, so it is time for the
electorate to take heed.<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>The people who need to wake up to Ted’s revolutionary
reality are not the general voting population, who have repeatedly said “enough
already”, but the Tea Party voting base, who rabidly support the momentum
without a clue as to why. Sure, there is
the 'Jesus' message, the racist appeasement, the homophobic crusade, the guns and
ammo litany, and the rock-star freedom of being an unapologetic white guy in an
aggressively changing racial demographic.
The Tea Party provides a raucous rebel battle cry for every disenfranchised
person who cannot adapt to social change.
But they will be geriatric sheep to the <i>Entitlements</i> slaughter. Because once Ted and the gang defeat <i>Obamacare</i>, they will take on <i>Medicare,</i> then <i>Social Security,</i> then insurance industry regulations, then everything else that <i>Big Business</i> does not like. The people who foster fear of the slippery
slope to a Socialist Nanny State are greasing the skids for a Corporate tax-free
Utopia where markets live a natural life and people die a natural death unencumbered
by government interference at any point. <o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiT1cu-MvNQUikTWoqXZkiOhiBr8FBFFsr483f18EKODOlB5cpwN6t9SPNCWkT79TvNn3nuZad3-gK0pRenR-XKUnopfKIWYObKkRzeIL2QM8jbDXqcgRGS6slYUVHEL-HoAmJBS_b15UV8/s1600/kamikaze+ted2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiT1cu-MvNQUikTWoqXZkiOhiBr8FBFFsr483f18EKODOlB5cpwN6t9SPNCWkT79TvNn3nuZad3-gK0pRenR-XKUnopfKIWYObKkRzeIL2QM8jbDXqcgRGS6slYUVHEL-HoAmJBS_b15UV8/s400/kamikaze+ted2.jpg" width="258" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><b>Kamikaze Cruz</b></span><br /><span style="font-size: xx-small;">Main stream Conservatives now<br />realize that Ted and his allies mean<br />to destroy Federal government in-<br />fluence. This is not a children's bed<br />time story. Things were fine when<br />Ted was attacking Democrats. Now</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">he's diving full speed toward their</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">home vessel with a tank full of highly</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">flammable election controversy.<br />For old school Republicans, this is<br />a political crusade that will live in</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">infamy.</span></span><br />
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<b style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Centrist Republicans grounded in reality
call the far right lack of compromise a civil war within the Republican Party. Some are calling Ted Cruz a <i>kamikaze,</i> sacrificing career and Party reputation for The Ideal. Ted
is enjoying such praise and notoriety within the Tea Party bubble that he
probably thinks he won't have to auger in. But we can take his pledge to fight to the last very seriously, even though
his keynote declaration of war is a recitation of <i>“Green Eggs and Ham”</i>. "<i>Try an isolationist small government. You will like it. You will like it on a boat, you will like it
with a goat…"</i> </b></div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: medium;">Custer's Last 21 Hour Stand?</b><br /><span style="font-size: xx-small;">Some concerned Republicans liken Ted's threat<br />to shut down the U.S. government to <i>Custer's</i><br /><i>Last Stand, and t</i>hey don't want to be massacred<br />politically with Cruz. Modern historians agree<br />that Custer was an inept commander with an<br />uncontrollable ego who needlessly led his<br />troops to slaughter. This may turn out to be<br />a defining metaphor if Social Security checks<br />do not go out as scheduled. Savage senior</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">citizens vote their wallets no matter how you<br />circle the wagons.</span></span></td></tr>
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<b style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Oh go ahead and sit down, Ted.
You will need your strength next month when you bring the U.S.
Government to a screeching halt. You
will want to be at your best when we all suddenly discover how foolishly
stubborn we have been, even though the pork you offer was
raised on Monsanto genetically altered subsidized corn, and the green eggs carry an
increased risk of salmonella poisoning because you defunded the <i>Food and Drug</i>
<i>Administration</i>. “<i>Thank you, thank you,
Sam-I-am</i>”. I mean Ted. Now please, <i>please</i> just sit down and shut up. You're giving me a headache, and a doctor dispensed aspirin costs $18 with a $200 deductible and a $20 co-pay.</b><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: medium;">The Attack on the U.S.S. Obamacare</b><br /><span style="font-size: xx-small;">is just the first battle in the Tea Party war against Federally mandated entitlement programs. Thanks to Gerrymandering and <i>Big Business</i> political funding, it may be the longest and most expensive political war in U.S. history, and one in which popular voter opinion will not be a significant factor.</span></span></td></tr>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06764990233512291170noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5914379235309520835.post-26459603720329216482013-09-21T04:15:00.001-07:002013-09-21T04:15:41.805-07:00<br />
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<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Twerkin' For a Living</span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">By Emma X</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: red;"><span style="font-size: small;">Emma X</span><br />"I came up in this Party time<br />to twerk!"<br /><br /></span><br />
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The fall season is upon us, and with it comes a new session of Congress. Our intrepid political warriors return to an America that is struggling on domestic and international fronts. The fate of Syria may rest in their hands. The future of <i>Obamacare</i> and the financial health of America teeter of the whim of a House vote. There have been 250 mass shootings* in America in 2013, or an average of one per day, and its only September. And need I point out, one year from now we face another Congressional election, one that many believe will determine the fate of the Republican Party ongoing. </span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><b><span style="font-size: x-small;">Clerk for Twerk Hasselbeck<br />"In best hands at Fox and Friends"</span></b><br /><span style="font-size: xx-small;">FOX News</span> hopes to improve ratings by adding<br />former VIEW co-host Elisabeth Hasselbeck to<br />the <i>Fox and Friends</i> couch. In her first week she<br />did not disappoint. She blamed gun violence on<br />video games and suggested purchasers be mon-<br />itored for hours of use. She said the Hillary Clinton<br />Benhazi investigation left top officials off the<br />hook. She asked Donald Trump if Obama should<br />be giving up his <i>Nobel Peace Prize</i>. And she re-<br />peated the oft-told FOX lie that Congress has been<br />granted special Presidential dispensation to opt out of<br />Obamacare. That's ripping and reading right off of<br />the Rupert Murdoch direct fax machine. We agree<br /> you're in the best hands at FOX, Lizzy. Keep on<br /> twerkin' it for daddy.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: #134f5c;">Wow. TV Networks would kill for a cliff-hanger reality show like this one. How will it all work out? Well, stay tuned. The far right thinks they know. They believe that 2014 Democratic candidates will all go home post election without a rose, because Republicans have faith in their own philosophical sex appeal. Regardless of what polls tell them, they have been out there twerkin' the message. </span></span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><b><span style="font-size: x-small;">Twerk Jerk Ted Cruz</span></b> spent his Congressional holiday<br />making his case for closing down the government. Old school<br />Republicans have warned that a government shutdown will be<br />blamed on Conservatives, but Cruz knows that if 42 votes to</span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c;">repeal Obamacare won't work, shaking down the whole<br /> electorate will.</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: #134f5c;">While lazy, Godless Democrats were enjoying the August break, the righteous rabid right was out on the road trying to convince Americans that shutting down the government is the only moral option available to us. Obamacare is a Progressive cancer that threatens the financial stability and the well being of our country. The cure? Threaten the financial stability and well being of our country!</span></span><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgr1EOb6WpJYgrs01qDB9c9T9aP1lYgJ16OuluhjJfAyrOFm6cvBZ8OMD5JLWCoqUmThixX7ZZ4c8vaWxDUJQe5xp3vpjJ9hlg3OzT5B26JOHdT-utUjsEq2gukQ4NP-GBVMZX98TEfqOTJ/s1600/mccain+twerk2+copy.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="290" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgr1EOb6WpJYgrs01qDB9c9T9aP1lYgJ16OuluhjJfAyrOFm6cvBZ8OMD5JLWCoqUmThixX7ZZ4c8vaWxDUJQe5xp3vpjJ9hlg3OzT5B26JOHdT-utUjsEq2gukQ4NP-GBVMZX98TEfqOTJ/s400/mccain+twerk2+copy.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><b><span style="font-size: x-small;">Aged Beef Twerky</span></b><br />John McCain has been working his own voter base to gain public<br />support for bombing Syria. He goaded Obama into establish-<br />ing the 'red line' and abused him publicly for not enforcing it.<br />He knows who's good and who's bad in Syria, because he<br />went there himself and they told him. He is now the de facto<br />President of the United States for Foreign Policy. This is no<br />shirk twerk! Somebody has to be in charge, and John now<br />knows you regret not voting for him in 2008. He is willing to<br />shake his naughty bits until you beg for <i>Da Bomb</i>!</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: #134f5c;">This tactic has actually been tried before, with very poor political results for</span> <span style="color: #134f5c;">Conservatives. But the <i>Neo</i>-phytes are short on Party history and common sense. They have come full circle to a solution that attacks their own base in the entitlements pocketbook. If you are of the opinion that such a move is not entirely rational, then you have not been caught up in the excitement of the <i>Conservative Media Road Show</i>. It's raucous, its raunchy, and the star performers think they have perfected their moves.</span></span><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhc4-wzl4n6-zhPUM2zNpoKtjNJDAd-pEn-sJeKF9bhRe1byljqhQFolLwfFhTg3MkE5WAiJbZU3HtkqqNxIW5MZ7acJw_kHckl8-jHNpmL6yZ9Xt3qEQe9Hpcdyase9NVkBH8l418WPeYT/s1600/mitch+and+john1+copy.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="262" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhc4-wzl4n6-zhPUM2zNpoKtjNJDAd-pEn-sJeKF9bhRe1byljqhQFolLwfFhTg3MkE5WAiJbZU3HtkqqNxIW5MZ7acJw_kHckl8-jHNpmL6yZ9Xt3qEQe9Hpcdyase9NVkBH8l418WPeYT/s400/mitch+and+john1+copy.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><b><span style="font-size: x-small;">Smirking Twerks</span></b><br />Republican Senators John Cornyn and Mitch McConnell<br />sent a letter to NFL Commissioner Roger Gooddell asking<br />that the league not take part in a public service campaign to<br />educate consumers about Obamacare. Conservative leaders<br />do not want the public to know that where the law is not<br />obstructed it is already reducing insurance costs. Twenty-six<br />Conservative-led States have refused to set up insurance<br />exchanges, thus delaying Obamacare implementation.</span></td></tr>
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<span style="color: #134f5c;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">So FOX now has its 'youth' appeal, </span><i style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The House</i><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> has its movers and shakers, and Republicans are back in charge of foreign policy. What could go wrong? All the dominoes are in place for a 2014 Conservative election landslide. But before that happens, we can all look forward to some rollicking, ass-shaking good old fashioned fun. This is not your grandma's Tea Party anymore. By all means, enjoy the ride.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="color: #134f5c;">*In the U.S. mass shootings are defined as a single incident with 4 or more shooting victims</span><span style="color: blue;">,</span><span style="color: #134f5c;"> including incidents of crime and domestic violence.</span></span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> </span></span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><b><span style="font-size: x-small;">Berzerker Twerker</span></b><br /><span style="font-size: xx-small;">World-class narcissist and future Melanoma patient Vladimir Putin invented political twerking. There's no Progressive bullsh*t getting a foothold in Russia on his watch. Say what you will about him, he knows how to move in on a power void when he sees one,</span><br /><span style="font-size: xx-small;">and he is now in control of the Syrian weapons issue, and by default, American military decisions in the Middle East.</span></span></td></tr>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06764990233512291170noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5914379235309520835.post-16869543231134942802013-09-14T03:53:00.000-07:002013-09-14T03:53:16.944-07:00<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEifyGUc2VABsIQ8xrdSQxWAeuwqzMZO3Nai2lrPArD9hcr4FOTPh5QiUsSt5WZyRLIneKhUvIQn9m4uc2XELGXCiX2v6ukSP2RuNbcMVV2wjCVb_si_d8005E0ybYbh3rWvDLRYBOr3-xpM/s1600/calendar1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEifyGUc2VABsIQ8xrdSQxWAeuwqzMZO3Nai2lrPArD9hcr4FOTPh5QiUsSt5WZyRLIneKhUvIQn9m4uc2XELGXCiX2v6ukSP2RuNbcMVV2wjCVb_si_d8005E0ybYbh3rWvDLRYBOr3-xpM/s200/calendar1.jpg" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c;">You can view the calendar and</span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c;">other merchandise at </span><span style="color: blue;">DCCC.org</span></td></tr>
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<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">House of Scandal</span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">By Muffy Furburger</span><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjLDMrWsAbtg-O3bMCPgdUsDFELwwdaR9sDj4-jr9rP4SK5yIzfrDU2aQjcLY7-zZDxS81SW49bshWjvBfnWaz2ghFDk1CLuAgGPIJJxCtGUhxTBXNcSDx6Qfu4hQI4eMLdmHq-Us4RQ_O_/s1600/muffy+furburger1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="189" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjLDMrWsAbtg-O3bMCPgdUsDFELwwdaR9sDj4-jr9rP4SK5yIzfrDU2aQjcLY7-zZDxS81SW49bshWjvBfnWaz2ghFDk1CLuAgGPIJJxCtGUhxTBXNcSDx6Qfu4hQI4eMLdmHq-Us4RQ_O_/s320/muffy+furburger1.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: red;"><span style="font-size: small;">Muffy Furburger</span><br /><span style="font-size: xx-small;">Resident Sex Expert<br />Looks like things are particularly hot in</span></span><br />
<span style="color: red;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">Florida.</span></span><br />
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Here's one that got by me. Did you know that the <i>Democratic Congressional Campaign</i> <i>Committee</i> produced a calendar revealing Republican financial scandals? There were so many GOP fraud investigations within a two year period (2011-2012) that the DCCC were able to produce a <i>House of Scandal</i> calendar, meant to be a revenue producer for the Democratic Party. Interesting, but very likely a marketing failure, as I can't see where the effort continued after September, 2012. I don't think the calendars flew off the shelves. I can only speculate that Republican financial plots just aren't as appealing as the antics of horny Democrats. Of great concern, yes, but not the thing to keep tongues wagging around the water cooler.</span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">As a general rule, Democratic scandals tend to be sex scandals, eliciting much more media attention than the tax dodging, book-cooking efforts of the GOP. That is not to say that Republicans do not get caught having the occasional men's room toe-tapping adventure, or that Democratic politicians are incapable of cheating on their taxes along with their long-suffering wives. Both sides can embrace corruption. They are politicians after all.</span><br />
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The calendar idea seemed unique. It just lacked the pizzazz that a good titillating sex romp provides. Perhaps it would have been more successful had they tarted it up a bit and added some spicy imagery. So I have taken the opportunity to suggest how things might have been presented to boost appeal for the Liberal consumer:</span><br />
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<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Re-presenting the <i>House of Scandal, Republicans Under Investigation </i>Pin-up Calendar for 2012:</span><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj9LZ5k86549zjGK7HDPYwJ4PRPKXHN0k4ui51X0l5xktVsqAkWjkZeODarLAkbokyjl-uqJAJZNzVhvREC05s9jjWh4sNqK5DJ9QMBwtct8E7s-ieYOQd7lnHHe4RgGP-gTgtERQkTOj-d/s1600/january+vern+buchanan1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj9LZ5k86549zjGK7HDPYwJ4PRPKXHN0k4ui51X0l5xktVsqAkWjkZeODarLAkbokyjl-uqJAJZNzVhvREC05s9jjWh4sNqK5DJ9QMBwtct8E7s-ieYOQd7lnHHe4RgGP-gTgtERQkTOj-d/s320/january+vern+buchanan1.jpg" width="162" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="color: red;">JANUARY, 2012<br />Florida Representative<br />VERN BUCHANAN</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c;">Naughty Vern is under investi-<br />gation for violations of Fed-<br />eral election laws. Vern<br />allegedly devised a scheme<br />whereby his employees were<br />reimbursed for donations to<br />his campaign, thus allowing<br />him to exceed legal donation<br />limits. Vern wanted the amount<br />of donation money coming in<br />to "make him look good".<br />Well, nasty Vern certainly<br />does! Our Mr. January is<br />the <i>House Fundraising Chief</i><br />and <i>Treasury Secretary of</i><br /><i>the House of Representatives</i>.<br />What magnificent testicular</span><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgIODOdVu-dkQrei5Tt56NlPy4e2WOIf-8b5ikAOa0jlOhvzvWCtKgdvbsY0yCL5yY-8Rp_HKmovOQRjjWA_iU-9hBKs3VHFzuQFkSR15WtuVMua18R8hxluA8miPYJWGfZD6M-lH8GgeKq/s1600/february+michael+grimm1+copy.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="247" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgIODOdVu-dkQrei5Tt56NlPy4e2WOIf-8b5ikAOa0jlOhvzvWCtKgdvbsY0yCL5yY-8Rp_HKmovOQRjjWA_iU-9hBKs3VHFzuQFkSR15WtuVMua18R8hxluA8miPYJWGfZD6M-lH8GgeKq/s320/february+michael+grimm1+copy.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: red;"><span style="font-size: small;">FEBRUARY, 2012</span><br /><span style="font-size: small;">New York Representative</span><br /><span style="font-size: small;">MICHAEL GRIMM</span></span><br />
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-size: xx-small;">Our bootylicious Michael is facing a<br />possible FBI probe for extortion. What<br />a lucky guy! Foxy Grimm allegedly<br />extorted campaign contributions from a<br />Rabbi. He is also being investigated in the<br />House for other 'undisclosed' violations of<br />House Rules. Oh Michael, you nasty,<br />nasty boy! I'd be happy to meet you in</span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c; font-size: xx-small;">an undisclosed location.</span></td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: red; font-size: small;">MARCH, 2012<br />California Representative<br />MARY BONO MACK<br />and husband, former<br />Florida Representative<br />CONNIE MACK</span><br />
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<span style="color: #134f5c;">This passionate couple is accused<br />of cheating on their taxes. They<br />claimed exemptions in both<br />Florida and California. They will<br />likely survive the tax scandal un-<br />scathed, but unfortunately their<br />marriage won't. In March of this<br />year the couple announced their<br />plans to divorce. Good news for<br />tax dodge groupies! This<br />desirable duo will be back on the<br />market soon.</span></td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: red; font-size: small;">APRIL, 2012</span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-size: small;">Former</span><br />
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<span style="color: #134f5c;">Sultry Sterns allegedly offered</span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c;">money and bribes to potential</span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c;">Republican Primary opponent</span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c;">James Jett to abandon a bid to </span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c;">run during the 2012 Primary</span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c;">season. Jett recorded every</span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c;">conversation and reported </span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c;">them to the FBI. Sterns lost</span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c;">the Primary election, and the</span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c;">FBI has not pursued the case.</span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c;">Jett is still crying foul and </span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c;">demanding to know why the</span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c;">FBI hasn't acted. We can</span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c;">certainly guess. Look at those</span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c;">luscious legs!</span></td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjHCxhemDaog13hqQuc0zGzei2k8NSKu3Aq4H_9-RxkcP2Sx10Hcemij108G1Qasi6LvMQbVHd-JZND1HFN_FFMM582TJnB2VOzWOF8WLoEeBe5TdQOhFqEciujT78QxeG_l5P6uulj1Mc7/s1600/may+david+rivera1+copy.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjHCxhemDaog13hqQuc0zGzei2k8NSKu3Aq4H_9-RxkcP2Sx10Hcemij108G1Qasi6LvMQbVHd-JZND1HFN_FFMM582TJnB2VOzWOF8WLoEeBe5TdQOhFqEciujT78QxeG_l5P6uulj1Mc7/s320/may+david+rivera1+copy.jpg" width="234" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: red; font-size: small;">MAY, 2012<br />Former<br />Florida Representative<br />DAVID RIVERA</span><br />
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-size: xx-small;">This tempting bit of joy <i>and</i> his<br />investigation are still HOT,HOT,<br />HOT! He is much desired by the<br />FBI and the IRS. David allegedly<br />used campaign dollars as a slush<br />fund to pay for personal expenses<br />for himself and some lucky lady<br />companions. He was then also<br />reimbursed for them, and took<br />deductions on his taxes. He<br />pursued legislation for his<br />mother's gaming company and<br />was able to funnel $500,000 to<br />her, with $100,000 coming back<br />to him. Looks like he's got<br />gaming in his blood too. He<br />has also been caught lying to<br />the FBI. Ooh you little stinker!<br />You'll become the darling of your<br />cell block when they get a load of<br />those pecs!</span></td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: red; font-size: small;">JUNE, 2012</span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-size: small;">Ohio Representative</span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-size: small;">JIM RINACCI</span><br />
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-size: xx-small;">This hunk of burning love is<br />currently under investigation by<br />the FBI for alleged campaign<br />violations. It's the same story as<br />Mr. January. A crony allegedly<br />reimbursed employees for<br />donations made, yadda, yadda,<br />yadda. Don't worry about Jim,<br />he's very resilient. Yes, Jim is<br /> very flexible indeed!</span></td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: red; font-size: small;">JULY, 2012</span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-size: small;">Florida Representative</span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-size: small;">VERN BUCHANAN</span><br />
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-size: xx-small;">Oh look who's back! Steamy sex<br />toy Mr. January is now facing a<br />Federal Grand Jury. Much of<br />the alleged evidence against Vern<br />came from people he tossed to<br />the wolves in attempt to pass<br />blame. Best friend of 20 years<br />Tim Mobley was convicted in<br />March, 2013, for making illegal<br />contributions to Vern's campaign.<br />Business parter Sam Kazran says<br />Buchanan pressured him to lie in<br />an affidavit. Keep screwing them<br />all, you sexy beast! Your lust<br />for money and power is highly<br />erotic.</span></td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: red; font-size: small;">AUGUST, 2012<br />Former Monroe County, New York<br />County Executive<br />MAGGIE BROOKS</span><br />
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-size: xx-small;">Passionate Maggie oversaw a County organization<br />rife with corruption. She allegedly used govern-<br />ment contracted labor on her campaign. Cronies<br />got jobs and contracts. Fifteen people involved<br />have pleaded guilty to various crimes that defrauded<br />taxpayers of an estimated $1,000,000. A 2011 audit<br />by the New York State Comptroller alleges that<br />Brook's administration misled the City Legislature<br />into approving a $99,000,000 contract with the<br />Upstate Telecommunications Company (UTC) that<br />"smacked of favoritism and has cost millions more<br />than necessary". The three UTC Board Members<br />were cronies, and two of them can't remember<br />ever attending a board meeting. Probably because<br />they were too dazzled by voluptuous Maggie!</span></td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: red; font-size: small;">SEPTEMBER, 2012</span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-size: small;">Failed Candidate for</span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-size: small;">Nevada Senator</span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-size: small;">DANNY TARKANIAN</span><br />
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-size: xx-small;">Charismatic Danny has run for<br />several State Offices and lost. In<br />2010 he made a failed bid for<br />Senator from Nevada. The main<br />thrust of that campaign was to<br />convince voters that his<br />African-American opponent was<br />just pretending to be black. I like<br />a man that thinks outside the box.<br />He is Mr. September because he<br />defaulted on a $17,000,000 loan<br /> for a proposed horse ranch.<br />The FDIC foreclosed on a parcel<br />of land intended to be used for the<br />business. While appealing their<br />ruling, Tarkanian quietly moved<br />$300,00. in personal loans to<br />his campaign for Nevada Senator.<br />He is the registered agent for a<br />scheme that tricked 400 people<br />into sending $2,000,000. in<br />donations. He also allegedly<br />helped incorporate at least 13<br />fraudulent charities that scammed<br />people through telemarketing<br />schemes. This X-rated lover<br />really knows how to turn on<br />the charm! Good luck, Danny.<br />Keep following your bliss.</span></td></tr>
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06764990233512291170noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5914379235309520835.post-279912662579531122013-09-07T04:04:00.000-07:002013-09-07T04:04:15.023-07:00<br />
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<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">The Syrian Quadrille</span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Malice in Wonderland II, Through the Looking-Glass, and What Alice Found There </span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">By Emma X</span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">With Apologies to Lewis Carroll</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
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<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjPopC8MZG-yTNHbk_qJpOC7Q4mrhyhdcgEFbkxniFPkzaICmYHHnM1X7nsYIgAbnDw6tUyunwN4fxIa_U_hHjyVBB81WOwctHq6fKVQ9tBYK8EpK9Mw2lbnPhRyjWdDfidKsUXfmNgH3ra/s1600/emma1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="196" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjPopC8MZG-yTNHbk_qJpOC7Q4mrhyhdcgEFbkxniFPkzaICmYHHnM1X7nsYIgAbnDw6tUyunwN4fxIa_U_hHjyVBB81WOwctHq6fKVQ9tBYK8EpK9Mw2lbnPhRyjWdDfidKsUXfmNgH3ra/s200/emma1.jpg" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: red;"><b>Emma X</b><br /><b>"Everything's got a moral, if<br />only you can find it."</b></span></td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiy7m7fqqhyxGFfz8v6jG7QEp_MmhEKAhEtr3O3J2IOIdNHR7J6eGeXz_X0la85iX0mQoxamRWJzr5YH8yYIEYcyWGTLIbRkeLB0M-LkAdw1kBSzaUKZGxRsIummskThHnYRTPQIQsES3xR/s1600/wonderland4.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="297" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiy7m7fqqhyxGFfz8v6jG7QEp_MmhEKAhEtr3O3J2IOIdNHR7J6eGeXz_X0la85iX0mQoxamRWJzr5YH8yYIEYcyWGTLIbRkeLB0M-LkAdw1kBSzaUKZGxRsIummskThHnYRTPQIQsES3xR/s400/wonderland4.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><b>"In a wonderland they lie, dreaming as the days go by."</b></span></td></tr>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>"Will you strike a little faster?", said McCain to 'Bama frail.</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>"There's a pollster close behind us, and he's whipping up a gale.</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>How eagerly we wait now, we want you to advance.</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Send up those loaded missiles. We want to start the dance!"</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>"Will you, won't you, will you, won't you, won't you start the dance?" </b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>"Will you, won't you, will you, won't you, won't you start the dance?"</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>"You can really have no no notion how delightful it will be</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>to bomb those evil muzzies, whichever tribe they be."</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>But Rand Paul said, "Too far, too far!" and gave a look askance.</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>He'll grandstand in the hearings, but he will not join the dance.</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>"Will not, can not, will not, can not, will not join the dance."</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>"Will not, can not, will not, can not, will not join the dance."</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>"Who cares about the Allies," said Kerry rather snide,</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>"There's another shore in Europe upon the other side.</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>If England will not help us, we'll turn our eyes to France.</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Will wonders never cease? They will join us in the dance!"</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>"Will you, won't you, will you, won't you, won't you join the dance?"</b></span></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>"Will you, won't you, will you, won't you, won't you join the dance?"</b></span></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Obama has the wherewithal, except where he does not.</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>He's passing that potato and the spud is warhead hot.</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Not wanting to get burned himself, he's left it all to chance.</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Will Congress vote to strike? Will they join him in this dance?</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>"Will they, can they, should they, won't they, should they join the dance?"</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>"Will they, can they, should they, won't they, should they join the dance?"</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>The Hawks are not quite sure. "Could this be a Liberal trap?"</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>The Doves are all a flutter. Their wings are in a flap.</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Congress in their wisdom doesn't have a solid stance.</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>"Will this action leave us open for another Mid East dance?"</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>"Will we, won't we, will we, won't we start a Mid East dance?" </b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>"Will we, won't we, will we, won't we start a Mid East dance?"</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>The fear of Western Nations for such a hostile push</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Reminds them of Iraq and the Quadrille of Georgie Bush.</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>And though he is not spoken of, the world still looks askance.</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>This fear is what he left us; this looks like his big dance.</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>"Will we, won't we, will we, won't we start a George Bush dance?"</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>"Will we, won't we, will we, won't we start a George Bush dance?"</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>The U.N. cannot act in this; forgive my being blunt,</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>but they have all been hijacked on the Russian/Chinese front,</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>and though they see the evil, they will not take a stance.</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Politics prevent them from a vote to join the dance.</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>"Will they, won't they, will they, won't they vote to join the dance?"</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>"Will they, won't they, will they, won't they vote to join the dance?"</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Meanwhile, Assad in Syria, has time to drain his cup.</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>"Thank you Western Leaders for the very big 'heads up'!</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>My weapons are with Hezbollah, my planes are saved from chance.</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Go ahead and take your time. I will not fear your dance."</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>"Will not, will not, will not, will not, will not fear your dance."</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>"Will not, will not, will not, will not, will not fear your dance."</b></span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;"><b>Crossing the Red Line in Wonderland</b><br />"When I use a word, it means just what I choose it to mean--<br />neither more, nor less."</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06764990233512291170noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5914379235309520835.post-80464190634368996672013-08-31T05:48:00.000-07:002013-08-31T05:48:15.352-07:00<br />
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<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Awkwardness and Hubris</span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">By Emma X</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">Emma X</span><br />Gentlemen, mom said<br />it best; no one wants<br />to see that. Keep it<br />in your pants.</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Today Bob Filner left public office. Right up to the end I don't think he understood why. His resignation speech was contrite, but it really was just a long complaint about how he had been railroaded out of his Mayoralship. Bob doesn't get it.</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><b><span style="font-size: x-small;">Looks like a Grouper, acts like a groper.</span></b><br />In his apology, Bob Filner said that his physical attentions<br />were meant as flattery, but were misinterpreted due to his<br />"awkwardness and hubris". Women don't misinterpret a<br />grope, Bob. If you can feel that grab through three layers<br />of clothing and torso-length Spanx, you understand the<br />intent. Hubris, yes. Awkwardness? Well not for lack of<br />trying. I will credit you though for not discriminating as<br />to the age, race, or even mobility of your victims. There's<br />a frustrated Feminist in there somewhere.</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Anthony Weiner continues in his bid for Mayor of the City of New York despite his steady decline in the polls. The insistence of community leaders, members of his own political party, and angry screaming citizens on the street cannot deter him from his path to destiny. Anthony thinks voters will see him as a determined leader that will not quit. We actually see him as a perv. Anthony does not get it.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The mystery is why these men, and others like them in positions of authority just can't see the forest for the turgid tree. If you or I had an angry mob outside our door screaming for us to cease and desist, we might pause and take stock. But inevitably men driven by power lust just double-down. I don't get it.</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><b><span style="font-size: x-small;">In the political world you can buy anything</span></b><br />but common sense. Fool me once, shame on you.<br />Continue to put your sexy selfies on Twitter? End up<br />doing political commentary on the new <i>Al Jazeera</i><br />network.</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Today's news is that Anthony Weiner has been paying actors $15. an hour to show up at his events and feign support for his candidacy. Really? How sad is that? And how short-sighted. For $17.50 he could have had them carry signs supporting photogenic </span><i style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Mr. Happy </i><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">as well. But for real money, he could have hired some true professionals, like Eliot Spitzer did</span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">. Pretending to be excited is their forte. And they would happily take care of that other need also.</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><b><span style="font-size: x-small;">Former NY State Attorney Genera</span></b>l<br /><b><span style="font-size: x-small;">Eliot Spitzer</span></b> seemed poised to overcome his<br />public sexual indiscretions, but recent polls show<br />he has lost a 19% lead over his opponent. This<br />after a failed career in in Punditry, and a failed<br />marriage. If his bid for Comptroller is unsuccess-<br />ful, look for Eliot on future episodes of <i>"Dancing</i><br /><i>With the Stars".</i></span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">It is clear that men like Anthony, Bob and Eliot view their 'hobby' as separate from their career, and they want you to do the same. They don't understand the </span><i style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">eeeew</i><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> factor. They don't understand the negative response of the women they victimize. In their psycho-sexual </span><i style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Conan the Barbarian</i><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> power fantasy, women are always very receptive to them. Go figure.</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><b><span style="font-size: x-small;">The most recent Quinnipiac Poll</span></b> graphically shows<br />the continued deflation of Weiner's initial buoyancy. <br />We should also pity current NYC Comptroller John Liu,<br /> who is not able to make a showing larger than Weiner's,<br />thus unfortunately reinforcing a cultural stereotype.</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Anyway, metropolitan voters are really being put to the test this political season. Maybe voting results will provide future candidates with some teachable clarity. Sadly, history tells us they probably won't.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Have a wonderful and safe Labor Day weekend. Soak in the last happy vestiges of summer. Maybe I'll enjoy a big juicy hot dog. I have a sudden craving.</span><br />
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06764990233512291170noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5914379235309520835.post-62788659380228097922013-08-24T05:02:00.000-07:002013-08-24T05:02:44.296-07:00<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
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<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Natural Born Killers</span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">By Nebu Ganesh</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><span style="font-size: x-small;">Nebu Ganesh, East Coast Liberal Snob</span></b><br />The Tea Party wants their Country back, and</span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">their country as they envision it is run by a<br />white man.</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Ted Cruz is busy making political rounds, trying to convince Americans to eliminate Obamacare. Anytime a politician hits the road speculation grows as to whether he or she isn't really out stumping for the White House. Only Ted knows that; but the ambitious Republican Junior Senator from Texas certainly looks the part, and his impassioned rhetoric against the <i>The Patient Protection and</i> </span><i style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Affordable Care Act</i><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> have caused some political pundits to view him as a Presidential possibility.</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: small;">Ted Cruz </b><span style="font-size: xx-small;">intends to renounce<br />his Canadian citizenship, thus<br />eliminating any controversy as<br />to his eligibility to run for the<br />highest public office. He may be <br />naive about the systemic racism<br /> in his own Tea Party. Canada<br />will be the talking point, but Cuba<br />will be the real issue.</span></span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Ted is out among the populace touting the idea of shutting down the U.S. Government in order to defund Obamacare. Not a sturdy political platform you might think, but the audiences coming to hear Ted's push are rabidly enthusiastic about his <i>'give 'em</i> <i>hell'</i> message, and its not going unnoticed by a fractured and frankly desperate GOP. Lets not forget the Party's expressed need to 'diversify'. As Ronald Reagan said, <i>"a half a loaf is better than none</i>", and for some in the Party, a half Cuban Conservative powerhouse may be more appealing than a good 'ole boy stuffed shirt with a terminal case of racial Tourettes. And remember, this is the Party that doesn't really understand the depths of their own racism. So <i>half a loaf</i> might be the recipe that delivers the Latin vote for the GOP. At least that's the hope.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">But wait a minute, there are a few problems. Ted was born in Canada. That wouldn't be an issue normally, as his mother is an American citizen, but unfortunately the Republican Party, either through direct malice or quiet approval, have knowingly abetted the </span><i style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Birther Movement</i><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">, the never-ending Tea Party fiction that President Obama is not an American. They have propagated that lie for six years despite the facts. And now </span><i style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Birther </i><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">paranoia could remove the White House from Ted's political future. That would be a good thing for some hard liners, because then they wouldn't have to mention race.</span><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjxUIo_2KjNqd_WQ6FDNdFyyNmzgTaPYTuxbOCwI__d54K9DkkfBTay6oC9sxxitaQgRLf8-q4BOvbZS1Vpt_RAnNScXEDOsTsRqn6HUPWUR5pdQP9fb4E8yXxP8yTl8oK5PNNSWh1DgyQi/s1600/ted+cruz+birth+certificate1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjxUIo_2KjNqd_WQ6FDNdFyyNmzgTaPYTuxbOCwI__d54K9DkkfBTay6oC9sxxitaQgRLf8-q4BOvbZS1Vpt_RAnNScXEDOsTsRqn6HUPWUR5pdQP9fb4E8yXxP8yTl8oK5PNNSWh1DgyQi/s1600/ted+cruz+birth+certificate1.jpg" height="265" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><b style="font-size: small;">A bit of a conundrum, eh?</b><br /><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;">This damning document proves that<br />Ted was born a Socialist. Tea Party<br />patriots have been conditioned to<br />question everything that smacks of<br />foreign influence, and here's a<br />smoking gun! It will be easy enough<br />for them to believe that something<br />is not quite right here, especially<br />after his Conservative rivals explain<br />it to them. Detractors on both sides<br />of the political spectrum are already<br />calling Cruz 'Canadian Ted'.</span></span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The <i>Birthers</i> are simple folk. They are not Rhodes Scholars. They need a way to negate the legitimacy of Obama's Presidency without publicly calling him a socially unacceptable name, and Tea Party strategists provide what they need. Now that they have heard the lie often enough to believe it, they are not going to be fooled again by another half-breed whose birth certificate proudly proclaims he was born in Canada. Nothing against Canada, of course. Its just a method used to combat Mr. Cruz' lack of racial purity. You see Ted, you would only be half-white in their book. And its not just the inbred Party base that will question your genesis. You don't realize it now, but take one serious step toward the Presidency, and your extremist peers will turn on you as well. </span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">They know how to spot a counterfeit. The fact that your given name is </span><i style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Raphael</i><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> and you don't use it tells them that you are hiding something. And Canada, that's a Socialist country, isn't it? Yes, you must be perpetrating a fraud. So talk radio and the Chauvinistic freaks that whip up anti-immigrant frenzy will toss their audiences this xenophobic bone to gnaw on, just like they did with that other half-white guy. Your political Kryptonite will be Article II of </span><i style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The Constitution,</i><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> and a phrase that reads </span><i style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"natural born citizen"</i><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">.</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: small;"><i>Birther</i> hero Donald Trump</b><br /><span style="font-size: xx-small;">will make fine fodder of the birth certificate<br />controversy whether or not he runs in a <br />primary. The smart guys won't even suggest<br />race. They will let morons like this do it for<br /> them. Yes Ted, your Party base respects the<br />word of a racist bleached-blonde comb-over<br />obtuse narcissist before that of an Ivy League<br />educated Senator like yourself. Welcome to<br />the <i>American Dream</i>. Its a hard road for any<br />immigrant.</span></span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Now you know and I know that if your parent is an American so are you, just as in your heart you know that President Obama is in fact an American citizen as well. But are you <i>natural</i> <i>born</i>? All that bullsh*t that you didn't stand up to fight against is going to come right back around and bite you in the ass should you throw your straw fedora in the ring. The GOP will use you to claim diversity and they will abet your crusade against Liberal legislation, and who knows, you may one day find yourself in a Primary debate, but in the end the Tea Party will kill your candidacy before America casts a vote. Why? Because you don't meet their image of ideological purity that a Conservative President should represent, which is purely white. And in secret conclaves that you, Ted, are not allowed to attend, they have vowed with a blood oath to never go 'there' again regardless of political alignment. Hey, they know you're </span><i style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">'</i><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">one of the good ones</span><i style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">'</i><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">, but facts are facts. To repeat their hackneyed phrase, </span><i style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"Its called the White House for a reason".</i><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: small;">Its all about the birth<br />certificate, </b><span style="font-size: xx-small;">wouldn't you<br />agree? Why mention racism?</span></span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Notice that I haven't mentioned the Liberals. They will have a field day, too. <i>What goes around comes around</i>, my friend. But take consolation in this; it wasn't going to happen for you anyway. Your religious extremism? Off-putting to believers of <i>Separation of</i> <i>Church and State</i>, not to mention the gay vote. Your stance on women's rights and birth control? Oops, there goes the ladies! And extreme positions like shutting down the U.S. Government? Wow, you really are naive on that one. That action would touch every American voter in a negative way. Also I'm not sure that Latinos see you as their advocate. And the Centrist elder Congressmen that you're attacking right now certainly won't be there to support your campaign. There's more, but why belabor the point. The truth is, you're not going to be a Republican Presidential Candidate, Ted. Sorry.</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><b><span style="font-size: x-small;">You're not alone, Ted.</span></b><br />Piyush Jindal, a.k.a. 'Bobby', does<br />not have a hope in evangelical hell<br />of winning on the national political<br />scene either, and he was born in<br />Baton Rouge. The Republicans<br />point to him to show diversity also, but<br />The Tea Party views the 'melting pot'<br />as something that should simmer<br />outside the White House. They don't<br /> want that odd foreign smell inside.</span></span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">So continue to carry water for the Tea Party. Let them use you to rabble-rouse. Kill evil Liberal legislation in its crib and be a Conservative hero. Go ahead and stand up for your vision of <i>God and Country. </i>But don't expect to rise higher than you have in political office. As the son of an immigrant, you have worked hard and your achievements should make your father proud. But for all you have accomplished, you still don't get to define your citizenship. That decision is still the province of the old white male establishment. And Ted, I promise you, deep down they won't see you as one of their own. In the big leagues, <i>natural born</i> is defined by race and zip code. But then you learned that at any early age. <i> </i></span><i><span class="hps">¿No es así</span>, <span class="hps">Raphael?</span></i><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: small;">One of the Tea Party's deepest fears </b><span style="font-size: xx-small;">is that an evil foreign agent will take over the White House. You look white enough Ted, but then so did this guy. The best way to avoid the whole psychodrama is to carefully select natural born candidates. I'm sure you understand.</span></span></td></tr>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06764990233512291170noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5914379235309520835.post-16639038067445698822013-08-17T04:34:00.000-07:002013-08-17T04:34:37.801-07:00<br />
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<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Lost in Translation</span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><i>Excerpts from The NEO Testament</i></span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><i>for the Conservative New World</i></span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">By The Right Reverend Ellsworth Goody</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">Rev. Ellsworth Goody, PhD.</span><br />Professor of Religion and Philosophy,<br />at New York University Online,</span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Author of '<i>Jehovah's Fitness'</i> and</span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i>'Religion by Pedigree'</i>.<br />"Perhaps we never understood the<br />Conservative Jesus."</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Most Tea Party politicians claim Jesus as their spiritual guide and The Bible as their infallable source of philosophical inspiration. I say most, because some carry around a well worn copy of </span><i style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Atlas Shrugged.</i><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> But even they espouse the teachings of Christ as central to their mission, and why not? It is the tried and true method for garnering money, influence and votes in America's current political climate.</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><span style="font-size: x-small;">Rand Paul</span> </b>is one of the most influential Tea<br />Party politicians. His political philosophy is<br />a hybrid. He says he loves Jesus, Ayn Rand<br />and Led Zeppelin. His policies lean heavily<br />toward <i>Objectivism. </i>They lack a <i>Whole Lotta<br />Love </i>for the common man, but he feels that<br />ultimately they are a <i>Stairway To</i> economic<br /><i>Heaven. </i>Ayn Rand said, "I am against God.<br />I don't approve of religion. It is a sign of<br />psychological weakness...I regard it as evil."<br />She hated Ronald Reagan as well.</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">They have not invented anything new. A political relationship with God has been going on since the first Shaman stood up from his trance and announced that he had just spoken with </span><i style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The Almighty</i><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">, and had a message for the tribe. That savvy cleric invented the politics of religion, and at that moment would-be rulers learned that the most effective way to control the populace is to link the will of God with the duty of the people. We have been living with the 'God and King' or "God and Country' model of government ever since.</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Jesus</b> presenting the Pilgrims with the NEO<br />Testament. "This day I give unto you a NEO<br />Testament. Only you and your decendants<br />will be able to successfully interpret my<br />words. Enjoy the New World and do what<br />you want with it. The Earth is only temp-<br />orary after all. By the way, the first thing<br />you need to do is put a lid on those natives.<br />May I suggest some plague infested<br />blankets?"</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">It was in the spirit of <i>The Enlightenment,</i> though, that the American experiment was born. The idea that all men are equal and able to establish their own representative government was radically new, emphasizing personal worth beyond that of the Greek model.</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><span style="font-size: x-small;"><b>Jesus feeding the multitude.</b></span><br />And he said unto them, "Give these loaves and fishes<br />to the hungry multitude, but charge them eight shekels<br />each. I know its a rip-off price, but where else can<br />they go? I tell you now, there is no free ride in heaven."<br />Matthew 14:13, <i>The NEO Testament for the</i><br /><i>Conservative New World.</i></span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Ironically, one of the most influential philosophies contributing to a belief in individual freedoms was that of Jesus of Nazareth. His words spawned anti-slavery movements, women's suffrage, and the American civil rights movement. Jesus cared about all people. So one might logically think that the right wing followers of Jesus would espouse the same principals that He did; feed the hungry, help the poor, heal the sick, etc. But there seems to be a dichotomy between what conservatives believe, and what they legislate.</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;"><b>Jesus rebuking the Pharisees</b></span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;"> over unfair<br />interest rates. And Jesus spake to them, "You have<br />made my house a den of thieves. You are charging<br />too much interest to the rich. Lower their rates,<br />and profits shall trickle down like manna from<br />heaven." Luke 16:19, <i>The NEO Testament for<br />the Conservative New World.</i></span></span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Perhaps that perception is in error. There have been many Biblical translations over the past six millenia. Maybe Tea Party politicians are in possession of a different tome with a different set of commandments. Perhaps God, as with The Mormons and </span><i style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The Book of Mormon,</i><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> presented the Pilgrims with a new book, a <i>NEO Testament</i> if you will, describing what religious immigrants to the New World should be thinking and doing in order to follow Him. This would explain what appears to be a conflict of moral purpose. It must be true. Otherwise Conservative Christian politicians look and act like huge honking hypocrites, and we certainly know that's not the case.</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;"><b>The woman taken in adultery.</b></span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">At dawn the rabbis brought a woman taken</span><br />
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">who is without sin cast the first stone." </span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Then he said to one of the Pharisees,</span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"Ahaz, you don't look very sinful today.</span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Go ahead and fire away." Later, Jesus</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"> John 8:1, <i>The NEO Testament for the </i></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">So while it is all conjecture, here are some possible alternatives to the Gospel that would explain Conservative Christian morality. Maybe in the modern world we don't understand Jesus at all. God bless our Conservative Christian leaders, and the new religious thought they seek to represent. May they reap all that they sow.</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><span style="font-size: x-small;">The road to the White House.</span></b><br />Then Jesus said to His disciples, "If anyone<br />wishes to come after Me, he must deny</span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Global Warming, and take up his Corporate </span><br />
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<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Matthew 16:24, <i>The NEO Testament for the</i><br /><i>Conservative New World.</i></span></td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">"<b>Render unto Caesar's</b></span><b> </b><span style="font-size: x-small;"><b>Palace</b> </span>a regulation-free business environment with a hard edge over the competition, and unto God a 10% piece of the action. Matthew 22:20, <i>The NEO Testament for the Conservative New World.</i></span></td></tr>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06764990233512291170noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5914379235309520835.post-64822663685651365902013-08-10T04:51:00.000-07:002013-08-10T04:51:37.522-07:00<br />
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<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Double, Double Toil and Trouble...</span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">By Emma X</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">Emma X</span><br />Fewer Republican Debates?<br />Hallelujah!</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Reince Priebus is afraid of Hillary Clinton. She hasn't said she is running for President in 2016, in fact she says she is not, but Reince is still afraid of her. And well he should be. If she decides to run she will win. If she decides not to run the candidate she campaigns for will win. The prospect is giving poor Reince nightmares. So he has sent letters to CNN and NBC crying foul over upcoming entertainment projects focused on Ms. Clinton, calling them nothing more than long playing free political ads. Its not fair, claims Priebus, and we know how much the GOP respects a level playing field.</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><b><span style="font-size: x-small;">Reince Priebus leads by example</span></b>, keeping<br />politics at a third grade level. In a letter to <br />Comcast VP David Cohen (NBC Universal's)<br />parent company) Priebus said, "Your company<br />has expressly stated that your choice to air the<br />(Clinton) miniseries in the near future would<br />avoid concerns of running afoul of equal time<br />election laws. This suggests a deliberate<br />attempt at influencing American opinion in<br />favor of a preferred candidate, not to mention<br />a guilty conscience." Priebus will undoubtedly<br />make his case repeatedly on Fox News, the<br />Conservative propaganda machine designed to<br />influence American opinion in favor of preferred<br />candidates.</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Let's forget for a moment that Hillary Clinton has credentials, world-wide political influence, an excellent relationship with the office incumbent, a good relationship with the Liberals in Congress, and a political team that can move and shake across demographic barriers. Evidently bringing that to light causes undue influence with voters. The real problem is that the GOP doesn't have a candidate to match her, or any other possible hopeful that the Democrats may put forward. You might think that a field of weak candidates could be blamed on the GOP for lack of preparation and foresight. But Reince is crying unfair to the so-called Liberal media. He has to. If there is no scapegoat, the Republican Party may just question its leadership. And if they lose, they most certainly will blame Reince, as soon as they figure out how to correctly pronounce his name.</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><b><span style="font-size: x-small;">"...and eye of Newt Gingrich..."</span></b><br />Hillary Clinton is the evil witch that<br />haunts Reince Priebus' dreams. If she<br />casts her political spell, the GOP will<br />fall to ruin. Her dark magic is abetted<br />by a 'blaspheming jew" in Hellscape<br />Hollywood, although Reince stopped<br />short of saying it that way. His own<br /><i>Growth and Opportunity Project</i> told<br />him not to.</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">So Priebus has to stop this Hillary momentum, and like a typical third grader, he is threatening to take his political football and go home. The GOP will not allow their Presidential hopefuls to participate in debates on CNN or NBC if those networks insist on continuing with their Clinton projects.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Thank God. What good news. That's a win/win for both Reince and the viewing public, although he probably doesn't see it that way. Just a few painful recollections of the twenty odd Republican debates in 2012 should cause you to leap for joy at this news. Unless, of course, you have a hostile fear of truth. Reince doesn't understand that NOT presenting the Republican Party Platform as interpreted by the Tea Party will take his candidates much farther down the road to 2016 victory. That is until the successful nominee meets up with Hillary. Or someone like her. Someone that is qualified and has their political organization positioned to win.</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><b><span style="font-size: x-small;">Hillary's evil minions in Hollywood</span></b> are hell bent on<br />deluding and destroying innocent voters who would otherwise<br />vote Republican. The lack of informative Republican debate<br />will lead us all to the slaughter. If true, Liberal Hollywood<br />will end up beating the GOP at their own media game.</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">There are some possible strong candidates in the GOP Big Tent, but the Tea Party has spent the past few years demonizing them and hurling feces at their political centrism from their fetid monkey cage in Congress. Honest, Reince, I don't know if you realize it, but you have hit upon the best possible solution for these trying times; keep that cage covered until the last possible moment. If you can convince your party and the world that this is a big boy power play at the same time, more power to you. If we don't have to listen to 24/7 of </span><i style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Bubble Bullsh*t</i><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> for two years, we the people will heartily thank you.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I have to admit that I do not understand the economic impact of the denial of Republican debate on these networks, nor did I look it up. CNN proved in 2012 that they could not deliver a hardball question to any political candidate of either party, lest they offend. So I guess that proves that debate ratings are important. They have left the field of journalism to compete for viewership with the <i>Sons of Goebbels</i> over at FOX anyway. Being bullied by Priebus is the least of the punishments they deserve. How they will handle this is their business, literally. But I doubt they will knuckle under. This appears to be the first in what will be a series of political grandstands designed to cause the public to believe that the GOP is forced to contend in a politically polluted environment fouled by prejudice. Who knows, some people may come to believe it. But the truth is, when you examine the bubbling cauldron of journalistic adventurism, it's clear where the malevolent smell is coming from.</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><b><span style="font-size: x-small;">Matt Moore</span></b><br />"I say, 'not in South Carolina!'<br />to debates produced by networks<br />that act more like Hillary Clinton's<br />campaign team than unbiased<br />news sources. Such political<br />favoritism has no place in<br />American journalism. Its<br />unacceptable..." Matt is one of<br />those rare Southern Amish Repub-</span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c;">licans that have never seen or<br />heard of FOX News.</span></td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><b><span style="font-size: x-small;">South Carolina,</span></b> the first State to secede during the <i>War of Northern Oppression</i>, was also the first State to back up the Priebus plan. Matt Moore, South Carolina's new Republican Party Chairman says that he will not allow CNN or NBC to broadcast debates of GOP Presidential candidates in his State if they air programs on Hillary Clinton. Be careful, folks. As South Carolina goes, so goes the Confederacy. BTW, the News Divisions of CNN and NBC have absolutely nothing to do with the programming in question.</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06764990233512291170noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5914379235309520835.post-26037585542649324932013-08-03T04:32:00.000-07:002013-08-03T04:32:17.292-07:00<br />
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<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Love Child</span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">By Rand Colbert</span><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgxj9haUkwXw_5gBdhZ02_Xq6bu35HBKaYZCexkkPFwK0WVjuq-O2Ft2Ka2pTAhEydk4W4to1w4cfRmEvswEpDcb_IxH0toi-peop6Q-KoAQ_MQ1FYp3IrP-qYZ2BRo4LSweDhVP7DaNvTq/s1600/rand+colbert+2013+by+line1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgxj9haUkwXw_5gBdhZ02_Xq6bu35HBKaYZCexkkPFwK0WVjuq-O2Ft2Ka2pTAhEydk4W4to1w4cfRmEvswEpDcb_IxH0toi-peop6Q-KoAQ_MQ1FYp3IrP-qYZ2BRo4LSweDhVP7DaNvTq/s1600/rand+colbert+2013+by+line1.jpg" width="247" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: red;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">Rand Colbert,</span><br />Stephen Colbert's Cat<br />Quid est veritas? Filii crudelis est,<br />vita sugit, atque in te moveat.</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I can't believe the prejudicial crap storm going on in 'Shitcago'. True Americans need to re-examine the pure motives of tireless public servant Jim Allen. </span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I mean, when he was making a public comment, he was a good soldier and said all of the politically correct things about Erika Harold's candidacy. As the Montgomery County Chair of the GOP he did get the diversity memo, and poor Jim did all he could as far as duty required. It was when he thought he was safe he let down his hair and spoke the truth as he sees it,</span><i style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> man to man,</i><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> about the Illinois Congressional election situation. And wouldn't you know it? Some Liberal-leaning RINO turncoat outed him on the Internet. You can't blame Jim. He is the real victim here. Enemies of right-wing ideological purity are creeping up to strike everywhere.</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><b><span style="font-size: x-small;">Shitcago, sight of the world's greatest political injustice.</span></b><br />Liberal pimps are taking over America's great cities, but if you happen to<br />mention it you lose your job!</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Good soldier that he is, Jim didn't realize that he was too low on the political ladder to not be expendable. I mean fellow conservative Congressmen (and I suppose Congresswomen) can spout prejudice and vitriol in the national political ring and get air time on CNN. Poor Jim cranks out one flaming e-mail about an uppity Beyonce ruining his plans to reinstate a white man in the Illinois Congressional seat, and he is woefully betrayed by a back stabbing Liberal-loving snake in the grass. I'm sure you can understand his surprise and shock. After all,<i> the fraternity</i> all talk that way in private. They must, else why would Jim Allen share what he had to know to be inflammatory rhetoric in a political e-mail?</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c;">Publicly, <b><span style="font-size: x-small;">Jim Allen </span></b>said that he was<br />happy with Davis (the male Republican<br />candidate) and that it would be "fabulous"<br />if Erika Harold ran for a different office.<br />"Why start a war when there's really no war<br />necessary?" He still retains his job in the<br />Illinois Secretary of State's Office, even<br />though he was forced to resign as a GOP<br />Party Chairman.</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">You can't expect a simple guy like Jim to be able to successfully sift through all the mixed messages that are out there. I mean, he didn't call Ms. Harold a street walker in public, did he? He didn't openly suggest that she was the bastard love child of the Democrats, or that she might only succeed in life because of minority quotas on the record. Faith was kept, people, both with the new politically correct party line, and the backroom ideology of white conservative male truth. Jim was railroaded folks, and as true Americans we should be horrified about his victimization.</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><span style="font-size: x-small;"><b>Doug Ibendahl, shadowy Editor-in-Chief</b><br /><b>of</b></span><i><b><span style="font-size: x-small;"> The Republican Newswatch</span></b>. </i>He is the<br />Benedict Arnold who published Allen's rant. This is<br />what he said: "Outrageous comments like those of<br />Jim Allen are why we as Republicans fail to gain any<br />respect from minority voters. If officials in my party<br /> fail to understand how destructive it is to attack an<br />impressive person like Erika Harold merely because<br />she dares to challenge the good-old-boys, the GOP<br />will remain a losing party for decades. This stay-in-<br /> the-back-of-the-bus mentality destroys any hope the<br />Republican Party has for regaining momentum in<br />future elections." Well, nobody would have had to<br />consider our 'mentality', Doug, if you hadn't presented<br />it as red meat to the Socialists growling in the 'back<br />of the bus'. You clearly understood the ramifications<br />where Jim Allen did not. Where's your party loyalty?<br />And what is it with you and hyphens? You use them<br />very <i>Liberally,</i> I must say.</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">So now Jim is out as the Montgomery County Republican Party Chairman. What a shame that Reince Preibus would turn on his own like that. We certainly have to question his commitment to the cause, I can tell you. Preibus said, "The astonishingly offensive views expressed by Chairman Allen have absolutely no place among the leaders of our party at any level. His behavior is inexcusable and must not be tolerated. He should apologize to Erika Harold and resign immediately." Do you think he meant it? No, he just made a sacrificial goat out of Jim Allen because he was expendable. If Preibus meant what he said, he would have sent a similar message to Trent Franks, Steve King, Michele Bachmann, Todd Akin, Michael Burgess, Ted Cruz, Louis Gohmert... well, the list goes on.</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><b><span style="font-size: x-small;">The Little Queen, Erika Harold,</span></b><br />former Miss America and would-be GOP<br />candidate for Congress. She's not ready to<br />compete against entrenched Republican<br />candidates in Illinois, and won't be as long<br />as she is only half-white and female.</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">So now you can see now that Jim Allen has been used poorly by the GOP. Write to Reince Preibus and tell him that you agree that street walkers and pimps should not be dominating Shitcago politics. Tell him you want an honest man like Jim Allen reinstated. The future of the GOP is in the hands of loyal men like Jim.</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><b><span style="font-size: x-small;">Hey, folks. Jim did apologize. </span></b> Since when is that not worth<br />something? I mean, this is all he said: "Rodney Davis will win<br />and the love child of the DNC will be back in Shitcago by May<br />of 2014 working for some law firm that needs to meet their quota<br />for minority hires. The little queen touts her abstinence and she won<br />the crown because she got bullied in school...boohoo...kids are<br />cruel, life sucks and you move on. Now, miss queen is being used<br />like a street walker and her pimps are the DEMOCRATIC PARTY<br />and RINO REPUBLICANS." All of this could come true, you know.<br />And Jim didn't call her a street walker, he merely said she was being<br />used like one. He did mention her abstinence, didn't he? There is no<br />way he can be construed as attacking her honor. And I think we can<br />all agree that Democrats and RINOs are pimps. Let's not be afraid of<br />a little truth, people. Tell Reince Preibus to bring Jim Allen home.</span></td></tr>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06764990233512291170noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5914379235309520835.post-41315984194005788872013-07-27T05:43:00.000-07:002013-07-27T05:43:30.048-07:00<br />
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<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Cannabis and Cantaloupes</span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">by Nebu Ganesh</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: red;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">Nebu Ganesh, Upstate Liberal.</span><br /><span style="font-size: xx-small;">If there is an honest man among them, its<br />probably Steve King.</span></span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">So here we are again. I would like to be making sophomoric jokes about Anthony Weiner's wiener, but Steve King keeps raising his ugly bulbous head and blocking my view. The House Representative from Iowa has gone mainstream with his hateful vitriol about Latino immigrants, causing unwanted negative attention toward conservative immigration policies. Now he informs us that the children of illegal aliens are worse than the dogs he describes in his favorite metaphor; they're drug mules, intent on destroying our culture and soaking up all our hard-earned resources so they can bask in the light of stolen liberty. But at least this colorful representation gives us more detail about our wily enemies. They are young, they weigh 130 pounds, and they have calves the size of cantaloupes. Keep a look out, America. These perpetrators will be very easy to spot on school playgrounds.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Don't mistake frustration for righteous indignation. Trust me, the GOP has good measure of the length and breadth of hateful feeling in their ranks, but now that Steve is spreading his offal on CNN airwaves, House Republican leaders have to appear to be appalled like the rest of us. Speaker John Boehner and Majority Leader Eric Cantor condemned King's remarks. Representative Raul Labrador (R-Idaho), who was born in Puerto Rico, called King's remarks "irresponsible and reprehensible".</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><b><span style="font-size: x-small;">Trey Gowdy, Chairman of the House Immigration Sub-<br />Committe, and Eric Cantor, Majority Leader.</span></b><br />Gowdy said that, " the number of people that have Steve King's<br />precise ideology with respect to immigration is not a sufficient<br />number to derail anything". Cantor called King's comments<br /> "inexcusable". Both Gowdy and Cantor voted against the<br /> DREAM Act.</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">What is actually irresponsible and reprehensible is that the Republican Party has let this hateful crap go on for so long. No one is surprised by King's bigoted lies. He didn't just crawl out from under a rock last Wednesday (although I do believe that is where he hibernates). It was convenient enough to allow this vitriolic rhetoric to go on during the 2012 election process, and if the GOP hadn't painfully figured out that the Hispanic vote can swing poll results, they wouldn't give a flying f**k about the plight of illegals in this country, let alone their children. Name one bill, or portion of a bill in support of immigration reform that this Congress, or the last Congress has passed. What is true, is that House Republicans, banding behind Steve King, have already voted to deport DREAMers.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Oh, you say, they are working on it. Yes, Boehner and Kantor are putting together a bill to replace the DREAM Act that The House killed earlier this year. After all, whatever measly piece of crap legislation that might go through has to have the GOP brand stamped all over it. </span><i style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">That is the point, isn't it?</i><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> But they are going about it with the enthusiasm of a petulant child forced to eat an unappetizing plate of steamed broccoli. There is no humanitarian motive behind the process. They just know they have to eat their disgusting vegetables before they get any political patron dessert, veggies that probably were picked by illegal immigrants.</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c; font-size: x-small;"><b>Let's do the math.</b></span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">OK Jose</span>, if an illegal Mexican drug mule weights 130 lbs<br />and can carry 75 lbs of weed, how many trips will it take<br />him to corrupt U.S. social structures and end freedom as<br />we know it? Yes, that's right. The answer is one. Now<br />how about this: There are 1.7 million children of illegals<br /> in this country. If 1 out of every 100 of them is a valedict-<br />torian, that means that there are currently 17,000 illegal<br />valedictorians. How many buses will it take to deport</span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c;">them and their families?</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Representative Joe Garcia (D-Fla) said that King's comments were "beneath the dignity of this body (The House) and this country". Sadly, the dignity of The House has become a low standard to meet. In a room filled with lying, backstabbing, greedy, partisan toadies of big industry, Boehner counts it a good work day if nobody gets bitch-slapped on camera. That is because fringe psychopaths like Steve King feel they are running the show now. And <i>that</i> is because the chief officer in charge of morale and deportment, <i>The Speaker of the House</i>, has allowed things to degrade to this point, as 'irresponsible and reprehensible' as that sounds.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">GOP National Committee Chairman Reince Priebus recently told a gathering of Latino officials that the Republican Party is reshaping its outreach to minority groups. He said, "In America, it doesn't matter where you come from; it matters where you are going". Another term for 'reshaping' is 'gerrymandering', and guess what? From the shape of the 2014 Republican candidate roster, it looks like DREAMers will be going back to Mexico.</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><b><span style="font-size: x-small;">The new image for American DREAMers,</span></b><br />as Representative Steve King would have you see it.</span></td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><b><span style="font-size: x-small;">Want some cantaloupe with that pork?</span></b><br />As usual, there are no facts to back up<br />Steve King's claims. He says he got his<br />information about the 1 to 100 ratio<br />between valedictorians and drug mules<br />from anecdotal conversations with<br />border patrol agents. Sadly, we are not<br />able to report the number or weight of<br />those agents, or how many of them were<br />valedictorians as well. We do know that<br />Steve has balls the size of cantaloupes that<br />allow him to carry hate to a new low level<br />of public discourse.</span></td></tr>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06764990233512291170noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5914379235309520835.post-88858809154709751622013-07-20T05:46:00.000-07:002013-07-20T05:46:05.825-07:00<br />
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<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Cooch Capering</span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">By Muffy Furburger</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: red;"><span style="font-size: x-small;"><b>Muffy Furburger, </b>free lance contributor.</span><br />Folks, if oral sex is wrong, I don't want to be<br />far right.</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Meet Ken Cuccinelli, Republican candidate for the Governor of Virginia. </span><i style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">'Cooch'</i><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">, as his friends call him, is banging it old school. He has spent a good part of his political career trying to reinstate sodomy laws that were removed from Virginia law books years ago. His stated purpose for the <i>Crimes Against Nature</i> statute is to protect children, a laudable endeavor. Unfortunately his proposed law clearly references acts by consenting adults. </span><i style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The Cooch </i><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">is very interested in what goes on in your bedroom, and this time around its for political gain.</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><b><span style="font-size: x-small;"><br /><span style="color: #134f5c;">Ken Cuccinelli</span></span></b><span style="color: #134f5c;">, (R) Virginia, known as 'Cooch' to his<br />friends, is the current Attorney General of the State of<br />Virginia who is running for the Governorship. He surprised<br /> everyone by introducing oral sex as an issue in the Governor's<br />race. He says his purpose is to protect children, but he<br />defeated a bi-partisan effort to take references to acts by<br /> consenting adults out of his bill, the <i>'Crimes Against</i><br /> <i>Nature</i>' statute.</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Of course, some of us have a different definition of 'crimes against nature'. Polluting the air, poisoning aquifers, destroying habitats, hunting animals to extinction and fishing marine populations until food fish are endangered all come to mind. But conservatives oppose regulation in these areas. What's burning their craw is what's going on in adult bedrooms in Virginia, and very likely elsewhere. The 'crimes against nature' old Cooch is referring to are adult acts that are an affront to his religious beliefs, and since he has a personal relationship with God Himself, your personal relationships must necessarily come into question.</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><b><span style="font-size: x-small;">More Cooch Capers</span></b><br />It shouldn't surprise you that Ken is an advocate<br />for abstinence only sex education in schools. Other<br />crimes against the Cooch include Federal Health<br />Care and the Clean Air Act. He has advocated<br /> allowing law officials to investigate the legal status<br />of anyone they stop. He wants to revoke citizenship<br />for anyone born in the U.S. of illegal parents, and<br />make a lack of English language skills a qualifier<br />to revoke unemployment benefits. If Coocher ever<br />finds out that illegals are practicing oral sex, I do<br />believe his head will explode.</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">His absolute knowledge about what is moral and ethical does not extend to his business practices. Coochie-coo 'forgot' to claim thousands of dollars worth of gifts from major benefactor Star Scientific, or mention that he owned more than $50,000. of stock in the company with whom he had dealings as Attorney General. When submitting paperwork for his Gubernatorial run, gifts from other corporations to Ken and his family totaling over $100,000 also slipped his mind. State authorities ruled no foul on the part of their Attorney General and allowed him to amend his financial disclosures. Cuccinelli definitely does not support opponent Terry McAuliffe's proposal to ban political gifts and give Virginia's ridiculously lax ethics laws some teeth. His <i>Crimes Against Nature</i> statute does not ban knob gobbling with political cronies and influence peddlers (metaphorically speaking, of course).</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><b><span style="font-size: x-small;">Of course, its just backlash </span></b>against the homosexual<br />civil rights movement, but you have to hand it to Cooch. Most bigots<br />just want American law to go back to where it was before the Nixon<br />administration. Ken Cuccinelli wants to roll it back to before<br />homosapiens had tongues.</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">So here is how the <i>Crimes Against Nature</i> law reads:</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i>"If any person carnally knows in any manner any brute animal, or carnally knows any male or female person by the anus or by or with the mouth, or voluntarily submits to such carnal knowledge, he or she shall be guilty of a Class 6 felony...". </i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Cucinelli told a newspaper reporter why he supports restrictions on the sexual behavior of consenting adults. He said, "My view is that homosexual acts, not homosexuality, but homosexual acts are wrong. They're intrinsically wrong. And I think in a natural law based country it's appropriate to have policies that reflect that. ...They don't comport with natural law." It has to be a proud day for a politician when you put forth potential legislation that would be resoundingly approved by the President of Iran and the Taliban. And how is it that America is a country of 'natural laws'? I view laws as secular social constructs myself. In a free society we create them to protect ourselves against guys like Cooch.</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><b><span style="font-size: x-small;">Violations of Islamic law</span></b> are 'offenses against God and<br />nature, including one's own nature'. Ken hates Sharia Law.<br />He's going to make sure it doesn't happen here. The Prophet's<br />sex police are un-American. Jesus' sex police know what's what.</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">So let me just say to my new friend Ken Cuccinelli, my view is that you are not wrong. Just your proposed statutes are wrong. They are intrinsically wrong. They don't comport with common sense. And should Virginia get its act together, the way you choose to conduct business might one day also be viewed as unnatural. Who knows? We could end up class 6 felons together. If that be the case, I'm sure your fellow inmates will welcome you and your views of sodomy with open arms. Naturally.</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><b><span style="font-size: x-small;">Give your honey a thrill tonight.</span></b><br />Tomorrow it may be illegal.</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">P.S. My sympathies to Mrs. Cooch.</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><b><span style="font-size: small;">Only married missionary sex, drugs and rock & roll.</span></b><br />If laws banning oral sex become more Draconian, popular culture will have to adapt. Virginia's favorite son Dave Matthews will have to change the <i>Lyrics Against Nature</i> in 97% of his songs, or face prosecution. Rock on Dave, for now. Just so you know, I would rather be licking you from your back to your belly too.</span></td></tr>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06764990233512291170noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5914379235309520835.post-20147832204702016042013-07-13T04:39:00.000-07:002013-07-13T04:43:07.761-07:00Admitting Privileges<br />
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<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Admitting Privileges</span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">By Emma X</span><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgqO1wBnsmEhyphenhyphenkcBQ7LRaekNspFjJNb9kBLzL1ATGoDPdWRNtrvA8ejrQY6gFyHb1pGggUEBKVu2Mc2UoLKErQGj3znerH6JEYLiUJgJn8RRImIr6YpSpp4lnfBHqAWW-s5Yiz9Cv9EaAF4/s1600/emma+fourth+of+july1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgqO1wBnsmEhyphenhyphenkcBQ7LRaekNspFjJNb9kBLzL1ATGoDPdWRNtrvA8ejrQY6gFyHb1pGggUEBKVu2Mc2UoLKErQGj3znerH6JEYLiUJgJn8RRImIr6YpSpp4lnfBHqAWW-s5Yiz9Cv9EaAF4/s1600/emma+fourth+of+july1.jpg" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: red;"><span style="font-size: x-small;"><b>Emma X</b></span><br />What's more American than legislating<br />morality, forcing invasive procedures</span><br />
<span style="color: red;"> and discriminating against the poor?<br />Happy 4th of July everybody!</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">In a last ditch panicked effort to control women and their bodies, Tea Party states are working feverishly to roll back the clock on Roe vs. Wade. With 2014 elections looming, time will not permit a constitutional change. They have been forced to use a <i>State's Rights</i> platform. Texas, Wisconsin, North Dakota and Arkansas are just a few states embroiled in pending law suits over restrictive new laws that severely curtail the number of abortion facilities and doctors available to women, and in some cases require additional unrelated medical exams designed to delay the process and shame and intimidate the patient. There have to be some personal rights violations in that prenatal package, but conservative legislators don't see it that way.</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><b><span style="color: #134f5c; font-size: x-small;">Admitting Privilege Requirements.</span></b><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c;">Many new anti-abortion state laws require women to</span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c;">have an ultrasound to view the fetus. The medical</span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c;">reason is that angry white men understand that Jesus</span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c;">wants women to feel shame about their bodies and</span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c;">their reproductive decisions, and also they are doing</span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c;">it just because they can. The majority of voting males</span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c;">remain silent on the subject, even though they have</span><br />
<span style="color: #134f5c;">some very sensitive skin in the reproductive game.</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The proposed legislation is not just about the number of weeks involved in the abortion decision process. Proposed bills contain Draconian measures designed to permanently close clinics, deny funding, intimidate medical professionals, and shame female patients. If passed, these laws will effectively eliminate abortion rights within each State and allow the State to make decisions about medical necessity. The philosophy behind the legislation also seeks to legally control choices prior to conception by restricting access to birth control. Neo-Cons agree that God gave us the sexual urge and told us to go forth and multiply, but left the procreation rule book to be hammered out by the State of Texas. It makes perfect sense, doesn't it?</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><b style="font-size: small;">Jerking off the truth.</b><br /><span style="font-size: xx-small;">Representative Michael Burgess (R-Tex)</span><br />says abortion is wrong because fetuses masturbate.<br />His point was that 15 week old fetuses feel pleasure<br /> (and therefore pain). His comments were based on<br />a single study where observations of a 32 week old<br />female fetus were reported, not a 15 week old male<br /> as reported by Burgess. The study made no definitive<br />conclusion about fetal sexual activity. Personally, I<br />am willing to believe that males begin masturbating<br />as soon as possible and do so at every given oppor-<br />tunity throughout life, maybe even before birth. But<br />Mr. Burgess didn't clarify any issue with his comments.<br />Now ultra-conservatives will have to find a legislative<br />method to keep fetuses from sinfully pleasuring<br />themselves. God's work is never done.</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Proposed restrictions in every contentious area effect all women, but are devastating to poor women who may not have the means to leave the State for treatment. Restrictions on the availability of affordable birth control hit this same demographic, as does the curtailing of food stamp programs assisting poor families. That seems a bit discriminatory to me, both on an economic scale and on a gender basis. I think we can all agree that it takes two to make an embryo. When legislating morality we should include all sinners in the process, including offending males. </span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><b><span style="font-size: x-small;">What's good for the goose is good for the gander.</span></b><br /> Men are in this reproduction game also, and presumably<br />equal to women under the law. When it comes to goosing,<br />they should get a gander of both ends of the gender war.</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Men in this culture have to provide financial support for the babies they help create, so why not let them share the social punishment for the decision to terminate an unplanned pregnancy. If a couple decides they cannot afford a child, the male should be forced by law to also comply with certain invasive medical requirements before an abortion is approved, just like the woman. If they are of reproductive age, we want men to be healthy as well, right? Each man who has helped create an embryo should be obliged to have a complete proctological exam before the wanton temptress that led him down the path of sin can have her abortion. And while the State approved doctor has a gloved hand up his ass, the prospective murderer can hear, as his female counterpart will, the ethical and moral precepts he is violating, and how each sperm in his ejaculate is sacred. Very few men would go through this experience before ultra-conservative reproductive philosophies would be up for re-evaluation.</span><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrhJeYLET7_pXeWQeMbwpSngX256pvsZ7K7ODCNwr-V4eSAPpnwUmG7fdGMi4ycji69hyphenhyphenXMDWIpgmg74wUMENlsYdv0cscMyVtPl2LhwHRoJLBMmoK4m9TPiVbFrmFlmmyTQXuSdQJ6NFJ/s1600/republican+baby2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrhJeYLET7_pXeWQeMbwpSngX256pvsZ7K7ODCNwr-V4eSAPpnwUmG7fdGMi4ycji69hyphenhyphenXMDWIpgmg74wUMENlsYdv0cscMyVtPl2LhwHRoJLBMmoK4m9TPiVbFrmFlmmyTQXuSdQJ6NFJ/s400/republican+baby2.jpg" width="298" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><b><span style="font-size: x-small;">The Tea Party</span></b> may think children<br />growing up in poverty will ultimately<br />choose to vote Republican. They should<br /> sponsor <i>Young Republican</i> meetings in<br /> orphanages and foster homes.</span></td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><b><span style="font-size: x-small;">Gov. Rick Perry of Texas</span></b> and<br />other politicians like him feel that<br />they own the only correct moral<br />perspective on this subject, and are<br />determined to insert their religious<br />beliefs into some very private places.<br />They remain equally <i>unwilling</i> to provide<br />support systems for women who<br />have children they cannot afford, or<br />resources for unwanted children who<br />will need food, shelter and education.</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Its time for men to admit the privilege they enjoy by </span><i style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">not</i><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> being harassed by government sin policies, and start defending the women in their lives. For women, the greater sin is the abandonment of male responsibility, both in emotional terms and in the protection of personal rights. Think of it this way: first they came for her, and I did nothing. Then they came for me with an ice cold cystoscope, and no legal provision for a local anesthetic.</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><b><span style="font-size: x-small;">And now a message from our legislation sponsor.</span></b><br />Jesus would like you to know that if we all would just quit having sex, everybody<br />would be in glory in just one generation. Well, maybe not everybody. There might<br />be <i>special admitting privileges</i> for some.</span></td></tr>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06764990233512291170noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5914379235309520835.post-39246407534173471582013-06-29T03:53:00.000-07:002013-06-29T03:53:23.370-07:00<br />
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<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">This Week in Racism</span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">By Nebu Ganesh</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><b><span style="color: red; font-size: x-small;">Nebu Ganesh, PhD.</span></b><br /><span style="color: red;">Conservatives take note: Even the <i>Master</i><br /><i>Race</i> needs basic science education. We<br />should be number one in death ray<br />production. Vote 'yes' for skinhead <br />scholarship.</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">If you have been thinking lately that Tea Party Representatives in Congress are just too slow in bringing about the new Fascist world order you yearn for, take heart. This week it was revealed that two intrepid and very stupid members of the KKK designed and marketed an x-ray concentrating death ray intended to kill 'muzzies' and other undesirable threats to <i>American White Supremacy</i>. At last someone is picking up the pace of reactionary change.</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><b><span style="font-size: x-small;">Glendon Crawford (left) and Eric Feight,</span></b> <br />alleged co-conspirators. They believe that the white race is<br />smarter than every other race, but they weren't able to put <br />together a workable weapon and not get caught in the attempt.<br />It looks like they will be spending lots of time with like-minded<br />patriots experiencing similar cognitive dissonance.</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The project was innovative, in that it employed current technology, used relatively inexpensive parts, and provided the would-be terrorist with a highly portable device. Sadly, there was no actual comprehensive workable design, and the only funding they could gather was from the FBI, who had to provide plans, parts and eventually help with assembly to keep their sting operation going.</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><b><span style="font-size: x-small;">The device was designed to be mounted <br />on a small van.</span></b><br />The design could not possibly accommodate enough power<br />to do damage to anyone, and the victim would have to hold<br />still near the device for a long time. Crawford got most of his<br />technical information from Wikipedia, which is probably the<br />real reason his death ray did not work</span>.</td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">But hey, at least somebody is out there trying to do something about the menacing hoard of undesirable dark skin tones working their way onto the fabric of our pristine, God-given white landscape. And the business plan had a marketing strategy, which was to enhance funding by offering the device to Jewish organizations for the purpose of quietly eliminating mutual Muslim enemies. A logical plan at the time, I suppose, but then that is how the FBI got involved. The perps forgot one of the first tenets of their ancient brotherhood, which is Jews can't be trusted either. Their potential clients called the FBI.</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><b><span style="font-size: x-small;">The Klu Klux Klan </span></b>has updated their arsenal of terror<br />technology to include x-rays. Fire and rope may be passe.<br />They have also been threatening to join the <i>Adopt a Highway</i><br />program nation-wide.</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">New York <i>White Supremacists</i> Glendon Scott Crawford and alleged co-conspirator Eric J. Feight evidently did not have the technical knowledge to carry out their plan, which was more comic book fodder than actual science. The partial device that was built was basically put together by the FBI, and never had a power source. Crawford is employed by </span><i style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The General Electric Company</i><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">, who wish it to be known that they had no knowledge of the death ray plan. There is certainly no visible connection between the company and the alleged weapon plot, just as there are no accurate statistics for how many people GE may have actually killed with the appliances they have manufactured over the years.</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><b><span style="font-size: x-small;">General Electric </span></b>had nothing to do with the death ray plot.<br />Besides, they moved their entire x-ray division from Wisconsin to<br />Beijing last year. That's where their good Engineers are now, and<br />where they could make a damn fine death ray machine if they<br />wanted to, but they don't want to. Not yet.</span></span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">What is not yet known is how NeoCons will react to this tantalizing news; will they applaud Crawford and Feight as anti-immigration patriots, condemn the FBI for entrapment, or will they accuse the Obama administration of leaking top secret death ray plans? When circumstances force you to decide what you hate the most, decisions can be hard.</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><b><span style="font-size: x-small;">This week Americans have been asked to decide if Paula Deen is racist</span></b> or just a crazy old cracker lady from the South. In light of the x-ray death scheme, we must now consider the body count generated by her cooking. I mean, bacon-wrapped deep-fried macaroni and cheese? That is a recipe designed to kill. And how many of her appliances were made by G.E.? Think about it.</span></td></tr>
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06764990233512291170noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5914379235309520835.post-63438651720050228552013-06-22T04:00:00.002-07:002013-06-24T11:20:47.118-07:00<br />
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<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">The Pick of the Litter</span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">By Emma X</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: red;"><span style="font-size: x-small;"><b>Emma X</b></span><br />Even I think dogs are better<br />than some people.</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Why was I ever concerned about the loss of crazy Michele Bachmann, when Steve King is in the political world? Tea Party bigotry and ignorance still hold sway in The House, where Representative King continues to pollute legislation designed to appeal to Latino voters. His racist, anti-immigrant views are at the forefront of proposed legislation this week. The Representative from Iowa managed to get two poison pills introduced into pending bills; one to negate attempts to curb animal cruelty, the other to end the </span><i style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">American Dream</i><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> for children of illegals. Another productive week for a man who serves Jesus.</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><b><span style="font-size: x-small;">Rep. Steve King of Iowa </span></b>says that his 'pick of the litter'<br />comments were complimentary. "People that can take a<br />compliment and turn it into an insult are not going to be<br />constructive working across the aisle." Democrats are<br />purposefully misinterpreting his motives, particularly in<br />light of his humane stance on animal rights.</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The irony is that both issues, animal rights and illegal status, are sort of the same for Steve. He has publicly compared illegal immigrants to dogs, and failed to see the hatred in the metaphor. "U.S. immigration law should only allow the 'best' immigrants into the country," says Steve, "similar to the way dog buyers would chose the 'pick of the litter'." It is clear to anyone who examines Mr. King's illustrious legislative career that he much prefers European breeds to the Central American variety.</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><b><span style="font-size: x-small;">Mongrels are violating our borders</span></b>. Representative King<br />is working tirelessly to save this country for purebred<br />Americans. When asked if the U.S. economy could function<br />without the presence of illegal immigrants, he responded that<br />the 77.5 million people between the ages of 15 and 65 who are<br />not currently part of the U.S. work force "could be put to work,<br />and we could invent machines to do the rest".</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">In January, King re-introduced his 'anchor babies' legislation, proposing the removal of citizenship of children born in America to illegal immigrant parents (co-sponsor of the bill was friend of the blog Louie Gohmert of Texas). Forget that people born on American soil are American citizens according to the Constitution. Steve says they must be hunted down like dogs and deported. He rejects criticism like a hound rolling in dirt to get pesky flys off his back, and why shouldn't he? No one is stopping him. His amendments are being approved. His peers continue without fail to toss him a bone every time he barks.</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><span style="font-size: x-small; font-weight: bold;">Mr. King went so far as to design a model </span><span style="font-size: xx-small;">border</span><br />fence to present to Congress. It can be electrified if needed;<br />not to the degree that it would kill someone, but it would act<br />as a deterrent. He knows it will work, he says, because "we<br />do that with dogs".</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">It's not like the current proposed legislation is strong. It's sole purpose is to try to get Latino voters to view the Republican Party favorably. Everyone knows their heart is not in it, and like-minded conservatives have already watered it down to the point of absurdity, introducing border protection requirements that would be impossible to achieve. Steve King seems to want to further rub our noses in it, and his fellow legislators won't make it a dog fight.</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><b><span style="font-size: x-small;">Senator Lindsay Graham</span></b> stepped in a big pile of dog<br />duty on Sunday by suggesting that the Republican Party<br />is facing a "demographic death spiral" that can only be<br />stopped by comprehensive immigration reform. Tea<br />Party Republicans rubbed his nose in it. King has said<br />that "members of Congress that vote for a guest worker<br />plan...will be supporting an amnesty plan and they should be<br />branded with a scarlet letter 'A' and pay for that amnesty in<br />the ballot box in November'.</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Recently the </span><i style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">College Republican National Committee </i><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">published the results of an extensive poll conducted to determine how young Latino voters feel about the Republican Party. It was titled, </span><i style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"Grand Old Party for a</i><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> </span><i style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Brand New Generation".</i><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> The bottom Line? Latino voters tend to think that the GOP could not care less about them. Words associated with the GOP were "close-minded, racist, rigid and old fashioned". So, Reince, don't spend more millions to find out why. Just take a good look at Steve King. He's your top dog in the fight.</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #134f5c;"><span style="font-size: x-small; font-weight: bold;">Latino youth </span><span style="font-size: xx-small;">are learning that <i>'A' is for Appeasement'</i>.</span><br />Legal or not, their first life lesson is about their value to<br />America. <i>'B' is for Border</i>, <i>'C' is for Control</i>, and <i>'D' is</i><br /><i> for Dog.</i></span></td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-small; font-weight: bold;">Rep. King is equally vocal on <br />animal</span> <b><span style="font-size: x-small;">cruelty legislation:</span></b><br />
"We've crossed a moral line" by<br />
"elevating animals up to that of humans."<br />
"There's something wrong with" outlawing<br />
dog fighting when 'people fighting' is illegal.<br />
Mr. King claims that he "has broken up more<br />
dog fights than he has started". Perhaps<br />
that's because his fellow conservatives are<br />
weak bitches.</td></tr>
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